


love you far after forever's gone

by twicelucky



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Historical, Angst, Gen, Joseon au, M/M, Magic, Mutual Pining, No mpreg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-08
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2019-10-06 13:13:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 32,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17345861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twicelucky/pseuds/twicelucky
Summary: Those close to the magic are subjects of the king like any other, but the king has mandated that they need to live apart from the rest of the people of Choson.Yugyeom doesn't expect to present as an alpha. Nor does he expect Jinyoung to have the magic.





	1. fire eyed boy

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Welcome! I really really never thought I'd be writing an ABO but I am. BUT this is definitely a different ABO than any you've read. This world is based on the kingdom of Joseon in its early-ish years (so... 15th century) but with werewolves, and tigers, and magic! (Oh my.) So there's that. I'm taking some risks here -- plot-wise and writing-wise. Please bear with me as I start this new adventure. 
> 
> I'm attempting to be somewhat historically accurate despite the fantasy genre, and so there is no Bam, Jackson, or Mark in this story. There will however be a second fic which will revolve around Bam, Jaebum, Jackson, and Mark so keep an eye out. 
> 
> Fic title from "Forever's Gone" by DRAMA.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugyeom meets Jinyoung when he is in his fourteenth summer and Jinyoung is in his seventeenth summer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from the song of the same name by Broken Social Scene.

Yugyeom and his family have always had to live separately from everyone else. Yugyeom's mother says that it's for their protection, but sometimes Yugyeom wonders if that's the truth.

Those close to the magic are subjects of the king like any other, but the king has mandated that they need to live apart from the rest of the people of Choson. So there are small pockets of magic hidden through the kingdom, communities of those with magic.

For Yugyeom and his people, it exists so that they can shift into other forms when they choose. But there are other forms too — tigers, or water dragons.

And then there are those in the kingdom who don't die, who feed on human blood. Those who died, but live on as spirits. Those who can twist the magic fabric in curious ways. Those who can control the magic. Those who can see the future.

Then there's the warped magic. The fierce red dragons, and snow leopards. The evil spirits, and malevolent ghosts. The goblins. Yugyeom has even heard his parents whispering about those who can raise the dead.

But he's never seen this kind of evil. Yugyeom was born in the Flower Fields, where the peaceful field spirits live amongst the wildflowers and brush. He grew up happy, playing with his field spirit friends and his parents. He'd never stopped to think that it was strange not to live with wolves, simply because he'd never met any other wolves.

\--

"You're more field spirit than wolf." Yugyeom's mother says when he comes home with flower chains that he's made to give to her. "But these are beautiful, thank you."

"Dahyun taught me!" He says.

"Smart girl. You could do to learn from her." She says and twists his nose lightly.

\--

But then Yugyeom's grandmother falls sick. Her shifting had always been a little strange, a little rougher than other wolves. At least that's what his mother told him when he asked.

"We need to move." Yugyeom's father says. "I want to take care of my mom, so we're going to move up north."

"Is she going to be okay?" Yugyeom asks.

"Of course." His father replies.

\--

"You're leaving?" Dahyun asks with wide eyes when Yugyeom reveals his news.

"I have to." Yugyeom says. "My dad's mom is sick."

"Oh no!" Hyunjin exclaims. "Does she need some fu ling? That'll make her better!"

"I don't think it will." Yugyeom answers glumly. "She's a wolf like me. I don't think that'll work like it does on you."

"Oh." Hyunjin says, looking disappointed.

"Will you ever come back?" Dahyun asks.

"I don't know." Yugyeom says. "My parents haven't told me."

"We'll miss you." Hyunjin says, and then the two of them wrap up Yugyeom in a tight hug.

\--

Yugyeom and his parents move to Moon Village in the wintery mountains up north. Moon Village seems more like a place for wolves to live than the Flower Fields. It sits at the base of a big mountain, nestled among tall trees. Everything is larger than Yugyeom is used to.

He has no idea what to expect. All he knows is that it'll be cold, and that the magic will be a little different that close to the mountains. He's never lived with other wolves. He's never even really seen much snow.

\--

Yugyeom meets Jinyoung when he is in his fourteenth summer and Jinyoung is in his seventeenth summer.

They meet at the welcoming ceremony. Jinyoung is a quiet older teenager standing between his smiling parents. Jinyoung's father is the stoic head of the village and his mother is the village mudang, dressed in bright blue and red robes.

Yugyeom is just at the point where he's starting to notice who is attractive and who isn't, and Jinyoung definitely falls into the former category. He has a handsome face, and even though he's slim, there are the foundations of muscles starting to form.

Yugyeom watches Jinyoung's mother perform the welcoming ritual -- warding off evil spirits and praying for prosperity with her tall hat and bells. It's unlike anything he's seen before: whirling dances and singing things that Yugyeom doesn't quite understand. It must be how they communicate with the magic, Yugyeom reckons.

\--

"Hello." Jinyoung says to Yugyeom after the ceremony is over, once everyone is eating a meal with foods that Yugyeom has never seen before.

"Hello." Yugyeom greets back, trying his hardest not to stare at Jinyoung. He's even more handsome up close.

"We're happy to have your family here in Moon Village." Jinyoung says, clearly something he was instructed to say.

"Thank you. We're happy to be here." Yugyeom says in response, just as his parents told him to say. He knows that they had to ask permission to move here, and that they need to set a good impression.

"Hmm." Jinyoung hums, and his gaze slides off Yugyeom.

"We're so grateful you could come." Jinyoung's father says, bowing to Yugyeom's parents. "We've needed a healer for some time now." He pauses. "And we hope that Moon Village will be able to help you too."

"Thank you for your graciousness. I'm here to be of service." Yugyeom's mother replies, bowing back. Yugyeom bows too. He hadn't expected the manners to be so formal here. He'd thought that it would be like the Summer Village, where everyone was friendly with everyone.

Instead, everyone is cool and careful. Yugyeom can feel stares on him. He knows that he doesn't look like the others. He's tanned, and his hair is lightened slightly from the sun. He's dressed in simple, light clothes, not the bold colours worn by the villagers here.

The heavy gazes on Yugyeom and his family make him acutely aware of the fact that he's just moved into a village of wolves.

\--

His grandmother lives in a small cabin further up the mountain, but she seems to be always out of the house when Yugyeom and his parents go visit.

"But she's sick." Yugyeom says after the third time they try to visit. "Where is she?" He's genuinely baffled.

"She might have shifted, and be unable to shift back. Sometimes that happens when you get old." Yugyeom's dad says, looking tense. "I just wish she could find us somehow."

"I'm sure she wants to." Yugyeom says, but he isn't so sure. His grandmother has always been a little wild -- the picture of a mountain wolf.

"We'll find her soon." Yugyeom's mother says cheerily, pulling Yugyeom in for a hug. "You don't need to worry."

\--

At first, Yugyeom doesn't have much to do with Jinyoung. Jinyoung is the son of the chief, and he spends most of his time with Jaebum, Younghyun, and Sungjin, the three closest to his age. He has no reason to spend any time with Yugyeom, the quiet child of a herbalist and a blacksmith.

Instead, Yugyeom spends his time with Youngjae and Jihyo. They're both close to his age, and they both almost always have a smile on their faces. For a shy newcomer like him, this is the best kind of friend, Yugyeom thinks.

He isn't shy for long though. Soon enough he's laughing with them, and playing around. Moon Village doesn't seem as scary as it did before. It's a small village with a well in the centre, and a shrine on the outskirts. It could be any other village in Choson, Yugyeom thinks.

\--

The magic is different — a little rougher, and wilder. Yugyeom feels it crackle sometimes in the mountains where before, in the fields, it would've hummed.

His mother tells him that the magic is just different everywhere in Choson, that closer to the mountains there's more elemental magic. That it hasn't been tamed or harnessed the same way it has in the warmer, more populated regions. She says that the king's necromancers can't control the mountain magic from Hanyang.

\--

Yugyeom doesn't know why, but he feels reluctant to talk about his grandmother to his new friends. His parents don't talk about it. Now, it seems as if they really did move here so that his mother could serve as the healer of Moon Village, not for the purpose of helping his grandmother get back.

His parents don't say anything and Yugyeom doesn't ask.

\--

There's lots to learn in this new place, Yugyeom finds. Things he had no idea about, like status.

"Your mom is an alpha right?" Jihyo asks Yugyeom one day. "She's so strong."

"A what?" Yugyeom asks, confused.

"An alpha?" She says.

"I don't know. What does that mean?" Yugyeom asks. Jihyo looks alarmed.

"What do you mean what does it mean? An alpha?" Clearly Yugyeom must look as confused as he feels so Jihyo continues. "You really don't know."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He confirms.

"He didn't grow up with wolves." Youngjae reminds her.

"Oh." Jihyo says, face lighting up in realization. "Oh! We can tell you all about it then!" She sounds so excited by this that Yugyeom lets her.

\--

Yugyeom's head is reeling with all this new information when he goes home for dinner that night. Only his father is home, his mother is at work.

"Hey Dad?" Yugyeom asks, unsure if he even wants to have this conversation with his father.

"Yes?"

"Mom is an alpha wolf right? And you're a beta?" Yugyeom says. His father chuckles.

"Yes. I suppose you just found that out?" Yugyeom nods. "Do you have any questions?"

"Not really... I think Jihyo and Youngjae explained... Never mind." He says, face flaming.

"We were going to tell you about it closer to your presentation. The process was just sped up by living with other wolves."

"My presentation..." Yugyeom tapers off. He hadn't even thought of that. He'd been too busy trying not to get overwhelmed with the information.

"In your twentieth summer I suppose we'll find out what you are." His father asks. "Not that it makes a difference to your mother and I."

"But Jihyo..." Told me it makes a difference, Yugyeom thinks. His father frowns as if he knows what Yugyeom is thinking.

"It's all fine." His father emphasizes. "It's really all fine. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."

\--

It's been almost a month since Yugyeom moved, when he comes across Jinyoung alone for the first time. It's rare. Jinyoung is almost always with his parents, or Jaebum, Younghyun, or Sungjin. And Yugyeom is almost always with his mother, or Youngjae or Jihyo.

So when Yugyeom finds himself out for an early morning walk among the fog and the tiny forest spirits, he's surprised to almost actually collide with Jinyoung.

"Sorry!" Yugyeom yelps.

"It's alright." Jinyoung says. "Good morning.

"Good morning." Yugyeom greets, and Jinyoung bows slightly in response.

"Hello." Jinyoung says. He looks uncomfortable, Yugyeom thinks.

"What are you doing up so early?" He asks.

"Just... clearing my head." Jinyoung says.

"Hmm." Yugyeom replies. A forest spirit scampers over his feet and squeaks. "Me too."

"You can join me." Jinyoung says quickly, and then looks as if he's just surprised himself. "If you want."

Yugyeom thinks about it. He really has no reason to say yes. He hardly knows Jinyoung.

"Sure." He says.

They don't say anything to each other. The only noises are the crunching of their boots on the earth beneath them, the animals around them, and the occasional forest spirit. The air smells good and clean among the trees like this, and Yugyeom finds himself lost in thoughts, hardly even paying attention to Jinyoung beside him.

\--

They don't quite ignore each other anymore. Yugyeom will sometimes catch Jinyoung looking at him where he hadn't before.

Yugyeom wonders if maybe someday they could be friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been doing a ton of historical research for this fic so I thought I'd include a few pertinent tidbits in each chapter for clarity's sake! 
> 
> Mudang is a kind of shaman in Korean folk spirituality. I chose not to use the translation because I felt like it fit best.  
> Hanyang is what Seoul used to be called.  
> 


	2. can you not feel it beating

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from the song "Runaway" by Late Night Alumni.

Yugyeom grows closer with Youngjae and Jihyo though. They're always around to help him with chores, or keep him laughing. Even though Yugyeom misses Dahyun and Hyunjin, he feels himself growing more comfortable in Moon Village.

Life is different here. He needs to do work around the village -- everyone has to. His mother works healing, and his father spends his days in the forge. Yugyeom and the other children have to do menial things: collecting firewood or water, sweeping, cleaning, or helping take care of the shrines.

Because of this he gets to know a few other people slowly. He spends a little time with Jaebum, Younghyun and Sungjin. They're quiet and serious, but kind enough. He spends some time with Nayeon too, and she's friendlier, always sending him smiles and cracking jokes.

\--

He and Youngjae pass by Jinyoung and Jaebum laughing about something one day. Yugyeom pointedly doesn't stare at the exposed line of Jinyoung's throat.

"They're pretty good friends hmm?" Yugyeom asks Youngjae, mostly to make conversation.

"What? Jinyoung and Jaebum?" Youngjae asks. Yugyeom nods and Youngjae laughs. "They're going to end up together. Everyone knows that."

"Are they promised to one another?" Yugyeom asks and Youngjae laughs.

"No. It's just... It's always been the two of them you know?"

Yugyeom isn't sure if he knows what Youngjae means at all.

\--

After two months in Moon Village, Yugyeom comes home to find his grandmother sitting alone in the greeting room, legs crossed neatly on the mat. He hasn't seen her in seven summers but she doesn't appear to have aged at all.

"Grandmother!" He exclaims. "You're back!"

"Yugyeom." His grandmother says, wrinkled face split into a warm smile. She pulls him into a tight seated hug. "I'm sorry it took me so long to get here."

"Where's dad?" Yugyeom asks.

"I saw him earlier, don't worry. And your mother. I thought I'd say hello to you before I left." Her tone suggests that she isn't talking about just leaving the hanok.

"You're leaving again?"

"I am. But I'll see you soon hmm?" She asks and Yugyeom doesn't know how else to respond other than to say yes.

She gets up slowly with his help, and then carefully hugs him again, fingers gripping his arms tightly.

"You're going to grow soon." She says finally, and then makes her way out the door.

\--

"You saw your grandmother?" His dad asks as soon as he gets home that night from the forge. Yugyeom nods.

"Just quickly." He says. "Where is she going?"

"She's taking a trip west." His dad answers.

"Will she be alright?" Yugyeom asks, thinking of how he had to help her stand up earlier.

"She'll be just fine." His dad says, and that's the end of the conversation.

\--

Yugyeom is out collecting herbs for his mother in the brush at the foot of the forest when he runs into Jinyoung alone again. This time though, he sees Jinyoung coming in his bright summer hanbok.

"Jinyoung!" Yugyeom calls out, and Jinyoung turns to look at him. Jinyoung waves, and Yugyeom waves awkwardly back. He wonders if Jinyoung is going to leave.

But Jinyoung approaches Yugyeom.

"What is that for?" Jinyoung asks, gesturing to the basket in Yugyeom's hand.

"I'm picking herbs for my mother." Yugyeom says sheepishly.

"Oh! You know about that kind of stuff?" Jinyoung asks, a flicker of interest in his eyes.

"A little." Yugyeom says with a shrug. "She's taught me bits and pieces."

"No one here knows much about healing." Jinyoung says.

"That's why she came." Yugyeom says awkwardly.

"Are you going to be a healer when you grow up?"

"I don't know." Yugyeom admits. "I suppose I know enough."

"Usually omegas are healers, but your mother is an alpha." Jinyoung muses.

"I didn't think it made a difference."

"It doesn't I guess." Jinyoung says slowly.

There's a moment of awkward silence, but then Yugyeom thinks of Jinyoung's offer to go on a walk that one morning.

"I could use some help. If you have some time." He says.

"I'm not due back until the evening." Jinyoung answers. "So I suppose I can."

Jinyoung follows Yugyeom around quietly at first, then asking more questions.

"What's that for?" Jinyoung asks, pointing to the mossy herb Yugyeom is gathering.

"It's for pain." Yugyeom explains.

"And that in the basket?" Jinyoung asks, reaching out to touch the mugwort in Yugyeom's basket.

"Careful!" Yugyeom exclaims, swatting away Jinyoung's hand easily. "It can make you see things. I have to touch it with a sleeve."

"Oh." Jinyoung says, cradling his hand carefully. "Sorry."

"It's okay. That's what I'm here for." Yugyeom says.

"What does it help with?"

"Clearing the blood." Yugyeom answers. "It's good when you need it. Or to burn it on the skin."

"Burn it on the skin?" Jinyoung asks, looking horrified.

"It's good for you." Yugyeom insists.

They continue walking, Yugyeom pausing occasionally to gather something his mother might need.

"What about that?" Jinyoung asks when Yugyeom stops to piece at some berries.

"This one just tastes good." Yugyeom explains. "Want to taste?" He offers a few berries to Jinyoung who carefully accepts them. His tongue sticks out carefully to eat one. Yugyeom's eyes watch the way he takes the berry into his mouth, the way his throat bobs as he swallows.

"Whoa." Jinyoung says. "That's good!"

"Have some more then." Yugyeom says, feeling himself flush for some reason, and dumping the rest of the berries into Jinyoung's hand.

\--

At the late summer feast, Jinyoung comes to eat beside Yugyeom, not his friends.

"Is this alright?" Jinyoung asks. Yugyeom nods, and Jinyoung passes him a piece of fruit.

"Here. It's good. It only grows in the mountains." He explains.

When Yugyeom bites in, the fruit is juicy sweet.

\--

The fall draws upon them. Yugyeom finds himself in colder weather than he's used to.

"It's cold." He complains to Jinyoung one day while they're sweeping the village together.

"You're a southern wolf." Jinyoung teases. "This is nothing."

"Or it's just cold." Yugyeom grumbles.

\--

Later that week, Yugyeom finds an oddly awkward Jinyoung approaching him.

"Oh. Jinyoung!" He says, greeting Jinyoung with a smile.

"Here." Jinyoung says, thrusting a fur towards Yugyeom. "Now you can stop complaining about the cold."

It's thick and lush, clearly someone did a perfect job treating it.

"I'll pay you back someday." Yugyeom promises and Jinyoung smiles that bright smile of his.

"Don't worry about it Yugyeom." Jinyoung says.

\--

Yugyeom stays warm that first winter.

\--

He grows during his fifteenth summer. He grows and grows and grows. Suddenly, he's taller than almost everyone in the village.

He's broader now too, than even his father was.

"You might be an alpha." His mother muses when Yugyeom outgrows all his old clothes.

"Don't generalize." His father says, and his mother smiles.

"I suppose I shouldn't." She replies, and Yugyeom has to laugh. His mother is just barely above five feet tall, and presented early as an alpha.

"Do you want me to be an alpha?" Yugyeom asks.

"We want you to be happy." His father says, and squeezes his shoulder.

Yugyeom doesn't know what that means really. He thinks he'll be happiest if he's a beta like his father. It seems to him as if being an alpha is too much work.

—

Slowly the cold days of winter give way into the cool days of early spring.

\--

Yugyeom finds himself sitting by the waterfall in the hills above the village with Jinyoung, dipping their feet in the cold mountain spring water.

"Remind me again why I'm doing this?" Jinyoung asks through gritted teeth.

"It's good for your health." Yugyeom answers, even though his feet are about to freeze off.

"You're making that up."

"I'm not." Yugyeom says, but then Jinyoung splashes him with icy water and they have a quick water fight.

They end up soaked and shivering.

"Let's go back." Jinyoung says, teeth chattering.

They curl up in front of the fire in Jinyoung's home, wrapped in furs and blankets. They fall into a comfortable silence, bodies warming slowly.

"Why is this place called Moon Village?" Yugyeom asks suddenly.

"You don't know?" Jinyoung asks with a laugh.

"No."

"Because if you climb the mountain behind the village on a full moon, it feels as if you can touch the moon, that's how big it is." Jinyoung answers.

"Can you show me sometime?" Yugyeom asks before he can stop to think.

"Of course." Jinyoung replies with a small smile. "The next full moon."

There's a lull in the conversation.

"Yugyeom...Why didn't you live with wolves before?" Jinyoung asks finally. "My father told me that you and your family... You used to live with field spirits."

"I'm not sure." Yugyeom says. "My parents never said."

"But your family is here. Your grandmother lives up on the mountain. I just don't know why you didn't live here."

"I don't know." Yugyeom says, feeling a little tense. He's never even stopped to think that it was strange not to live around any other wolves.

\--

Spring bleeds into summer. It's been a whole summer cycle since Yugyeom moved to Moon Village.

—

Summer blooms, and Jinyoung takes to coming with Yugyeom to pick seasonal herbs.

"Can we stay here for a moment?" Jinyoung asks one day when they're out gathering the roots of wild ginger in a meadow to the south of the village.

"Sure." Yugyeom says, blinking at Jinyoung.

Suddenly Jinyoung sits down in the meadow.

"Hyung? Are you alright?" Yugyeom asks, squatting down beside Jinyoung.

"Yeah." Jinyoung answers with a heavy sigh.

"That doesn't sound like you're alright." Yugyeom says, shifting to sit fully.

"It's just.. There are things that I have to do that I don't want to do." Jinyoung says, staring off into the distance.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to." Yugyeom says.

"I wish it were that simple." Jinyoung says, lying down among the wildflowers. Yugyeom imagines him in a flower chain. Yugyeom carefully lies down next to him, aware of how strange this situation is.

"Why can't it be?" Yugyeom asks. Beside him, Jinyoung snorts.

"You'll understand someday." He says.

"Why can't I understand now?" Yugyeom asks, pouting. "I'm not a child anymore."

"You act like one sometimes." Jinyoung says with a laugh, reaching over to flick Yugyeom's forehead.

They fall into an easy silence, just lying in the grass and staring up at the sky.

"I know you aren't a child." Jinyoung says eventually. "But you aren't quite an adult yet."

"I know." Yugyeom says and then pauses. "I don't want to grow up and present. It seems so much easier like this."

Jinyoung stays silent for a moment.

"I know what you mean." Jinyoung says slowly. "Sometimes I wish that too."

Yugyeom doesn't know what else to say so he doesn't say anything else. He stands up slowly, and offers a hand to help Jinyoung up.

They start making their way back to the village on the tiny path, Yugyeom leading the way. The sun is starting to get lower in the sky. Yugyeom hopes his parents won't be too mad that he's late for supper.

"Before we go..." Jinyoung says from behind him.

"Yes?" Yugyeom asks, turning back to face Jinyoung.

"Can you give me a hug?" Jinyoung asks, so quietly that Yugyeom almost thinks he misheard the wind or something.

But he puts his arms out anyways, and Jinyoung steps into them immediately, sighing happily. They stand there for a moment, just hugging. For a second, it looks like Jinyoung is sniffing him, but Yugyeom quickly casts that thought aside. He doesn't have a scent.

"Your growth spurt is good for something then." Jinyoung says. He sounds happy and Yugyeom just squeezes him tighter. He likes the feeling of making Jinyoung happy.

Yugyeom pulls away first.

"We should get back to the village." He says. "Your father will get worried."

"I know." Jinyoung says, sounding a little sad. "Thanks for today though, Gyeom-ah." Jinyoung says, using the nickname like it's no big deal.

"Any time." Yugyeom says, and smiles at Jinyoung. He hopes Jinyoung knows that he means it.

\--

Time goes on.

—

Jaebum presents as an alpha in the spring after that winter.

It comes as a complete surprise to everyone except Yugyeom it seems.

Jinyoung looks unhappy by this change. Yugyeom can see it in the set of his brow, in the tense slope of his shoulders.

He doesn't see much of Jinyoung for a while that spring. Jinyoung seems to always be busy, always be off somewhere.

\--

"You've been busy lately." Yugyeom complains to Jinyoung.

"Sorry." Jinyoung says, not looking particularly apologetic. Yugyeom pouts. "Stop that!"

There's a pause before Yugyeom says what he's been meaning to.

"Hyung presented." He says. Jinyoung doesn't respond. "I thought he'd be an omega." This gets a laugh out of Jinyoung.

"Jaebum-hyung? Really?"

"Yeah. He's secretly soft." Yugyeom whispers and Jinyoung laughs again, more openly this time.

"Don't let him catch you saying that." Jinyoung says, smiling.

"I won't. He doesn't even know me that well so I don't think it would go over very well." Yugyeom muses.

"Hyung has his pride." Jinyoung says. "It's... perhaps a flaw in some situations."

"Are you okay?" Yugyeom asks, thinking of Youngjae telling him about how fated Jinyoung and Jaebum are. "It must be a change now."

"It is a change. But perhaps it isn't a surprise."

"What do you think I'll present as?" Yugyeom asks, trying to change the subject and make Jinyoung feel more comfortable.

"A nuisance." Jinyoung replies with a snort.

"I thought I already was one." Yugyeom says with a pout. Jinyoung laughs.

"I'm not sure to be honest. You're tall, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything. You aren't very nurturing, but you're sweet enough."

"So I'll be an omega? Or a beta?" Yugyeom thinks. He wouldn't mind being either of those.

"Probably." Jinyoung muses. "I don't know though. I can't see you as an alpha."

"Not like Jaebum-hyung." Yugyeom says quietly.

"No. Not like hyung." Jinyoung agrees. "But there isn't anything wrong with that." He adds.

Yugyeom doesn't quite know what that means.

\--

The mid-summer festival comes around before Yugyeom can even realize it. It starts in the dark -- late at night in the summer, and Yugyeom makes his way to one of the shrines to find a roaring fire already in place.

The drums are going, and everyone is singing and clapping, and Sungjin has pulled a stringed instrument from somewhere.

And Yugyeom watches his parents dance. It isn't the way that the other wolves dance, but they make it look effortless. It must be a dance from somewhere else, he figures, but it isn't something that he's ever seen his parents do.

He looks over the leaping flames to see Jinyoung staring intently at him. Yugyeom looks away. For just a second he considers what it would be like to dance with Jinyoung.

He dares to peek again, and Jinyoung is looking away now, but for the rest of the night Yugyeom will feel eyes on him and know that it's Jinyoung.

\--

When Yugyeom has finished his seventeeth summer, Jinyoung has finished his twentieth summer, and he hasn't presented as anything. Jinyoung doesn't seem like himself that summer, Yugyeom thinks.

\--

One day in the fall he finds Jinyoung standing in the forest, among the fallen leaves.

"What're you doing here by yourself?" Yugyeom asks. Jinyoung whips around, but calms when he sees that it's Yugyeom.

"Avoiding everyone." Jinyoung answers with a laugh. "I guess it isn't working."

"Oh. Sorry. I'll let you be alone." Yugyeom says quickly.

"No! I mean... you can stay. If you want."

"Okay." Yugyeom says tentatively. "I'll just... stand here?" Jinyoung doesn't respond, which Yugyeom takes to be permission.

They stand there for what feels like an eternity.

"Your mind looks heavy." Yugyeom says.

"It is." Jinyoung replies.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." Jinyoung says. And then. "Yes."

"Is it... Jaebum?" Yugyeom asks.

"No! No. It isn't hyung." Jinyoung replies quickly. "It's me. I'm not quite right." Jinyoung says bitterly. "I haven't presented. There's something wrong."

"That doesn't have to mean anything. It just means that you're taking a little longer." Yugyeom says, swatting at a lazy tigerfly. "It happens."

"It hasn't happened in the history of Moon Village." Jinyoung spits out. Yugyeom feels the hair on the back of his neck rise.

"What if your body is waiting?"

"Waiting for what? Someone to make me present?" Jinyoung asks incredulously.

"You've heard the stories... Sometimes it happens." Yugyeom says slowly. "Just because it hasn't happened here doesn't mean that two people aren't highly compatible-" Jinyoung's face darkens.

"What do you know? You've never even lived with wolves until now!" Jinyoung says angrily, and then storms off. Yugyeom sighs heavily.

When he looks down, the spot where Jinyoung was standing is scorched as if its been burned. Yugyeom glances around. There's no other signs of fire. He crouches down and touches the earth and leaves. It really has been burned. It must've been there before, he thinks.

\--

Yugyeom has a lot to think about after his conversation with Jinyoung. First, he isn't sure why Jinyoung seems so personally affected by the fact that he hasn't presented. He'd even said years before that he wasn't looking forward to presenting, so isn't this really what he wants? Yugyeom isn't sure.

Jinyoung has a point though. Yugyeom hasn't ever lived with wolves before this. He doesn't know everything. But he does know that his parents have talked about compatibility before, he swears.

It's real. Some wolves are sometimes more compatible biologically than others. His parents had described it as instinct, and even though they hadn't talked about status -- compatibility seems to have nothing to do with status. It's the magic, not status.

Yugyeom frowns. He wonders not for the first time why his family lived separately for so long.

\--

"Mom... Why didn't we live with wolves before?" Yugyeom asks her tentatively that night. He has no idea how she'll react.

"We... it's complicated." She says, one of her eyebrows raised. "But I suppose it's fair that you're asking."

"How complicated can it be?"

"More complicated than you think." She says, pursing her lips. Yugyeom recognizes the signs that she isn't going to give away much more information than that. "But now we do. And you seem happier here with your new friends so everything has worked out."

Yugyeom can just hold in his sigh.

\--

Yugyeom is out collecting firewood in the forest a few days later when he hears voices arguing somewhere in the trees. He really doesn't mean to eavesdrop. He doesn't. But he can hear Jinyoung's voice, and he feels himself just halt without thinking about what he's doing.

"Why don't I smell like anything?" He hears Jinyoung ask. He doesn't sound very happy. Yugyeom leans in closer to try and hear better.

"I don't know." Younghyun answers honestly. "It's weird, I can't lie to you. But I wouldn't worry. You'll present soon."

"I hope so." Jinyoung says.

"Does it bother you?"

"No."

"Then why are you fussed?"

"Hyung keeps asking me."

"Jaebum?" Younghyun asks incredulously.

"Yeah."

"Why? It doesn't really make a difference to him."

"He thinks... he wants us to be mated." Yugyeom feels a pang of anger come up at that.

"Do you smell something?" Jinyoung asks suddenly and Yugyeom panics. He rushes away quickly before he can be spotted by them. He doesn't really understand why, but he doesn't like the idea of Jinyoung knowing that he'd heard that conversation. It was Jinyoung revealing personal details. He's allowed privacy.

Yugyeom wants him to have privacy. He wants Jinyoung to know that he respects him.

He wants the best for Jinyoung.

\--

"What happens if someone hasn't presented at their twentieth summer?" Yugyeom asks his parents over dinner that night. They send each other strange looks.

"It doesn't have to mean anything. It might mean they're late. Or that they're waiting for someone else to present." Yugyeom's father replies slowly.

"That hardly happens though." Yugyeom says with a scoff. Everyone knows this. Some presentations happen because another person presents. Nobody knows how this happens, they just know that if this happens, it's because the two people are highly compatible. There's a thread of magic that connects them, that draws them together.

"That's true. So they're just late then. It happens. We're all a little not normal." Yugyeom's mother says. "Nothing to worry about."

"Why do you ask?" His father asks.

"Just curious." Yugyeom says with a shrug. He's sure that his parents know who he's asking about -- everyone in the Moon Village knows that Jinyoung hasn't presented yet.

"I'm sure that everything will work out." Yugyeom's mother says warmly. "It's good to be supportive though."

"I try." Yugyeom answers with a blush. "I mean -- I have nothing to do with this!"

"I'm sure you don't." Yugyeom's father says with a snort, and Yugyeom's mother whacks him with her chopstick.

\--

Yugyeom doesn't know what to think after his conversation with his parents. He's reassured, because it means that Jinyoung is fine, but also he feels a little odd even contemplating that Jinyoung's presentation could be delayed because of someone else. Because Jinyoung is so compatible with someone that his body wants to wait. Yugyeom wonders what it would be like to be in that situation.

\--

Jinyoung continues to ignore him. Yugyeom continues to ignores him back, too stubborn to break first, even if he isn't even frustrated with Jinyoung anymore.

\--

Jinyoung breaks after a week. He hunts down Yugyeom in the forest, collecting winter herbs. Yugyeom wonders how Jinyoung knew where he was.

"Can I talk to you?" Jinyoung asks. Yugyeom nods.

"Here?" He asks, and Jinyoung shakes his head before grabbing Yugyeom's hand and leading them into the forest. Yugyeom wonders who he's trying to hide from. They wind up at the snow-covered shrine. Someone has left a bowl of rice and some vegetables at the shrine, and there's some incense burning but otherwise there's no signs of life.

There's an uncomfortable pause. Yugyeom is staring at the earthenware rice bowl.

And then --

"I'm sorry." They both say at the same time. Yugyeom looks at Jinyoung with wide eyes to see Jinyoung smiling at him.

"Oh." Yugyeom says with wide eyes. "Um. You go first."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you. It had nothing to do with you and that wasn't fair." Jinyoung says sheepishly.

"It's okay hyung." Yugyeom reassures.

"It isn't. You aren't a child. And you're my friend. I can't treat you like that."

"Thank you." Yugyeom says, trying to convey as much of his gratitude as he can. "And I'm sorry for not being more understanding." Yugyeom says. "I shouldn't have pushed back against your feelings. You're allowed to feel what you feel."

"You're too nice to me." Jinyoung says quietly. "I don't deserve a good dongsaeng like you."

"Yes you do." Yugyeom says, and walks close enough to jostle Jinyoung's shoulder lightly. "And I deserve a good hyung like you."

The smile Jinyoung sends him is golden.

\--

Yugyeom is with Jaebum helping to collect water from the deep well in the centre of the village when they hear a panicked yell.

"Help!" Yugyeom hears, and both he and Jaebum turn to see Younghyun sprinting towards them. Jaebum drops the bucket.

Younghyun looks like he's ran ten miles. He's flaming red and panting, and there's a pine branch stuck to his coat. Curious, other villagers gather around too.

"What is it?" Jaebum asks. "I thought you went out with Nayeon to go check the far shrine."

"And Jinyoung. We were out in the forest and we came across a ghost goblin. It cornered them, I could get away but only Nayeon can shift to protect them." Younghyun gasps out. Yugyeom's blood goes cold.

"Where?" Jinyoung's father asks, coming out of seemingly nowhere to push through and look at Younghyun.

"Just past the waterfall." Younghyun answers. "The one by-"

"I know the one. We'll go." Jinyoung's father says.

"I want to go too." Jaebum says, hands fisted by his sides.

"You'll stay here." Jinyoung's father says. "You've only recently presented." Yugyeom can see Jaebum ready to protest, but he calms himself down. Jinyoung's father gestures to a few others to join him, and they take off at a run into the darkest part of the forest.

"A ghost goblin?" Jaebum asks. Younghyun nods. "We haven't had one of those around here in years." Jaebum says with a frown. "Jinyoung..."

"You left him?" Yugyeom blurts out. "You left them?"

"I had to. It cornered them." Younghyun says frankly. "Nayeon has presented and she can protect Jinyoung. He can fight too." This reasoning doesn't make Yugyeom feel any better, even though he knows that Younghyun did what he had to do.

Yugyeom's heart is pounding. He needs Jinyoung to be okay.

His stomach tenses and his palms start to sweat. He doesn't even fully understand why he's reacting so strongly. It would be natural to respond to his friend being attacked by a ghost goblin. Especially since he and Jinyoung had grown closer. But the extent to which he seems to be affected feels like too much, Yugyeom thinks as he paces back and forth, back and forth, waiting for any sign of anything. He doesn't know what's going on. He just knows that he needs Jinyoung to be okay.

It seems like an eternity before Jinyoung's father and the other men return, already shifted back. They're surrounding Nayeon, who looks a little pale, but is walking by herself. Yugyeom feels his heart drop into his stomach. He can't see Jinyoung. Something must be wrong. He doesn't understand how Jinyoung's father can look so nonchalant. Yugyeom starts mentally preparing for the worst.

But then Jinyoung comes into sight, looking a little pale but otherwise alright. The ball of anxiety inside Yugyeom's stomach loosens. He takes a step towards Jinyoung, then another. He just needs to make sure.

"Are you alright?" He asks, and before he understands what's happening, he's throwing his arms around Jinyoung and pulling him into a tight hug. He's so happy Jinyoung is back.

"Yugyeom!" Jinyoung squawks out. "What's this?" He's stiff under Yugyeom's touch just for a split second before he relaxes. Yugyeom's shoulders bracket Jinyoung's.

"I was so worried about." Yugyeom says quietly, just loud enough for Jinyoung to hear. He can feel the panic subside as he lets himself feel Jinyoung in his hands.

"Why?"

"I don't know." Yugyeom replies honestly. "But I couldn't stop thinking about if something happened to you."

"You're ridiculous." Jinyoung huffs, but he unmistakably presses in closer to Yugyeom. For a moment, Yugyeom swears that Jinyoung smells like something, but just as quickly as the scent came on, it disappears.

All too soon, there's a cough from beside them. Jaebum and Sungjin appear from somewhere, and Yugyeom becomes acutely aware of everyone watching them, including Jinyoung's father. Yugyeom reluctantly pulls himself away from Jinyoung. His skin feels cold where Jinyoung had been before, and the knot in his stomach tightens up a little bit again.

Yugyeom wants to reach out and touch Jinyoung again. It doesn't need to be much. Just a little bit. Just a hand on the back of Jinyoung's neck. Or an arm slung over a shoulder.

But there's no reason for him to touch Jinyoung. He had no reason to hug him like that.

Yugyeom sees his mother check over Jinyoung and Nayeon, frowning at something on Nayeon's arm and then dragging her away, probably to the infirmary. He hopes she's alright.

"Are you alright?" Jaebum asks when Jinyoung makes his way over.

"I don't have any injuries." Jinyoung says. "Nayeon saved us, and she only got a cut on her arm." 

"Come, I'll take you home." Jaebum says stiffly. It's perhaps the closest Yugyeom has seen to Jaebum exhibiting his alpha status.

"It's okay. Yugyeom can take me." Jinyoung replies quickly, and even though Yugyeom wasn't going to say anything, wasn't going to challenge the order of things, he's relieved. Jaebum looks like he's about to protest, but he doesn't say anything. Yugyeom doesn't say anything either. Yugyeom can't help but feel pleased at Jinyoung's choice.

They fall into silence on the walk back to Jinyoung's family's hanok. Yugyeom keeps sneaking looks at Jinyoung. He can't help himself. He just needs to make sure that everything is alright, that Jinyoung is alright.

"Stop staring at me. You're creeping me out." Jinyoung grumbles, and Yugyeom flushes a bit. He hadn't thought that Jinyoung could see him staring.

"I'm glad you're safe." Yugyeom says again. "And you're sure that-"

"I'm really fine." Jinyoung repeats with a laugh, interrupting Yugyeom.

"Good." Yugyeom says. "Okay. I'll leave you here then."

"I'll see you tomorrow Yugyeom." Jinyoung calls out.

"See you!" Yugyeom calls back cheerfully. "We should go see Nayeon tomorrow hmm?"

"Okay. Let's do it." Jinyoung says with a small smile. "Goodnight Yugyeom."

"Goodnight Jinyoung." Yugyeom says, watching Jinyoung go in the door.

Yugyeom feels oddly satisfied on the walk back to his house.

Jinyoung is his hyung, someone he wants to take care of, the same way that Jinyoung has always taken care of him. Especially now that he's taller, even though Jinyoung is older, Yugyeom feels this urge to protect, to take care of Jinyoung. Of all his friends really.

But there's a small part of him that wants to take care of Jinyoung differently. He doesn't fully understand, but it's there. He wants to be the one that Jinyoung calls when he needs help. He wants to be the one Jinyoung calls when he wants someone to spend time with. He doesn't want Jinyoung to have to ask Younghyun or Sungjin.

He especially doesn't want Jinyoung to have to ask Jaebum for anything. And he doesn't know what that quite means.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every herb that I've mentioned in this fic is actually used in traditional Korean medicine (hanbang).  
> Mugwort was believed to be hallucinogenic so some people would cover their skin when picking it (hence why Yugyeom does).  
> Hanok is a traditional Korean house, dating from the Joseon dynasty.


	3. with you in the sweet lives and the moonlight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from "Sugar" by Peking Duk

The next day Yugyeom goes to find Jinyoung at home to make sure that he's okay. But Yugyeom stops in his tracks when he hears Jinyoung before he sees him. He'd be hard-pressed not to really, Jinyoung is almost yelling.

"You don't affect how I feel about these things." Jinyoung is saying from inside his house. He sounds mad.

"I know!" Jaebum replies, voice rising. Yugyeom leans in. He didn't think that Jaebum ever raised his voice at Jinyoung, especially now that he'd presented and Jinyoung hadn't.

And so Yugyeom finds himself eavesdropping once again.

"I'm just trying to say that if only I'd presented, I'd be able to protect myself." Jinyoung says miserably. "I'm a failure."

"You aren't!" Jaebum says. "How could you even think that?"

"Because it's true! You know it. You're the one who keeps asking when I'll present!" Jinyoung snaps.

"I'm just curious! You're my best friend!"

"Is that all?" Jinyoung asks. "Because best friends usually aren't so nosy." He adds, sounding even angrier. Yugyeom has rarely ever heard Jinyoung this mad.

"Jinyoung!" Jaebum says angrily.

"Can't wait for me to present so we can mate then, like everyone has expected us to?" Jinyoung asks, and Yugyeom can practically see the sneer on his face. His jaw drops. He can't believe that Jinyoung is confronting Jaebum about the issue. He didn't even know that Jinyoung had feelings about it. He assumed that Jinyoung was just going along with the future mating.

"You aren't yourself." Jaebum says tensely.

"You aren't yourself Jaebum!" Jinyoung yells. "You haven't been since you presented as an alpha!"

"What do you mean? You mean that I can't want my friend of forever to be with-"

"Stop right there." Jinyoung interrupts. "I think you should get out before I get really mad." He sounds pretty mad to Yugyeom.

Suddenly, Yugyeom can hear the sliding of a door and he realizes that he's about to get caught eavesdropping on a very personal conversation.

He sprints to hide behind a big tree and peer through the leaves at Jinyoung's house. Jaebum comes out looking stormy and severe. Yugyeom watches him stalk off towards the centre of the village.

He waits one more beat and then comes out from his hiding spot. Jinyoung is just coming out of his house, looking remarkably calm for the conversation that Yugyeom just overheard.

"Jinyoung!" Yugyeom calls out cheerfully. Jinyoung turns and smiles at Yugyeom, a bright smile that makes his eyes crinkle. Any sign of unhappiness is erased off Jinyoung's face. If Yugyeom hadn't heard Jinyoung's conversation with Jaebum he would've never known

"Yugyeom!" Jinyoung calls back, approaching Yugyeom.

"Did you sleep okay?" He asks. Jinyoung looks like he hardly slept.

"It took me a while to fall asleep." Jinyoung replies. "But my dad wouldn't let me sleep in."

"I'm sure he wouldn't." Yugyeom says with a snort. "Come on, let's go say we're going to tend the shrine and have a nap."

"What if we get caught?" Jinyoung asks with wide eyes.

"We won't." Yugyeom assures him. "We'll be tucked out of the way so even if someone does come up to pray, they won't see us."

"Let's go then." Jinyoung says.

They tell one of the men in the village where they're going, and then Jinyoung leads them up the narrow winding path to the shrine.

"Which bench?" Jinyoung asks, and Yugyeom points to the one at the back, behind where someone would stand to perform a mourning ceremony. It's tucked away behind some big willow trees, kept out of sight.

Yugyeom sits down and watches Jinyoung curl up on the bench beside him.

"Aren't you sleeping?" Jinyoung asks.

"I'll keep watch." Yugyeom says. "You go ahead."

"Are you sure?" Jinyoung asks, propping himself up on his elbow.

"Yeah. You deserve some sleep." Yugyeom says.

Jinyoung arranges himself for a few minutes, clearly uncomfortable.

"You can rest your head on my lap if you want." Yugyeom offers shyly. He doesn't think Jinyoung will take him up on the offer. But Jinyoung shifts over right away to put his head on Yugyeom's thighs.

"Thanks Yugyeom." Jinyoung says, eyes already fluttering shut. Yugyeom averts his eyes until he's sure that Jinyoung is asleep.

Jinyoung is peaceful in his sleep, and so beautiful that it makes Yugyeom's stomach twist. The strong lines of his face are softened in sleep, and it feels oddly good to have Jinyoung in his lap like this, Yugyeom thinks. He reaches a hand up, tempted to stroke Jinyoung's hair, but he chickens out. He doesn't want to wake Jinyoung, he tells himself. No matter how soft Jinyoung's hair looks.

Yugyeom lets Jinyoung sleep for a few hours. Just as he suspected, no one else comes up to tend the shrine. Yugyeom allows his mind to wander. He thinks about the conversation that he'd overheard.

He can't imagine the pressure that Jinyoung must be under, but he had no idea that Jaebum was making it worse. Jaebum is Jinyoung's best friend. How could he force Jinyoung into doing something he didn't want to do? Yugyeom feels unsettled at the thought of doing anything that would make Jinyoung unhappy.

But yet... he feels a slight amount of envy towards Jaebum. He is promised to Jinyoung. They have something that hardly anyone else has. Yugyeom wonders what it must be like to have that kind of bond. A smaller part of him wonders what it would be like to have that kind of bond with Jinyoung in particular. It... wouldn't be a hardship, Yugyeom thinks. Just at that moment, Jinyoung snuffles in his sleep and tilts his head towards Yugyeom's torso. His face is dangerously close to Yugyeom's crotch, Yugyeom notes. But he doesn't want to wake Jinyoung. He deserves the rest. So, even when Yugyeom's legs cramp up, he forces himself to relax.

\--

Eventually, Jinyoung wakes up, looking up at Yugyeom with bleary eyes, scrunching his nose. He looks... cute, Yugyeom acknowledges.

"We should go back to the village soon." Yugyeom murmurs and Jinyoung makes a noise of agreement. He watches Jinyoung sit up slowly and stretch. His hair is ruffled at the back from resting on Yugyeom's thighs.

They're walking back to the village when Jinyoung pauses. Yugyeom stops too, waiting for what Jinyoung wants to say.

"So, there's going to be a full moon soon. I promised to show you why it's called Moon Village, remember?" Jinyoung says, looking almost nervous.

"I remember." Yugyeom replies.

"I'm going to keep my promise. If you still want me to?" Jinyoung asks.

"Yeah. Yeah! Of course." Yugyeom replies quickly.

"Okay. It's a plan then." Jinyoung says. He seems happy that Yugyeom agreed. "It's beautiful."

"I can't wait." Yugyeom replies, smiling at Jinyoung. Jinyoung smiles back. The extra rest looks good on him.

\--

"Do you want to come over on the full moon?" Youngjae asks Yugyeom the next day. "My mom is making something good. She said to invite you. Jihyo's already coming."

"Thanks Youngjae." Yugyeom replies gratefully. "But I'm doing something with Jinyoung." Youngjae's eyebrows shoot up in response.

"With Jinyoung? What are you doing?" He asks.

"He told me he'd show me the full moon." Yugyeom says shyly. Jihyo and Youngjae share a knowing look.

"Oh." Jihyo says. "So. Just you and Jinyoung. Alone. On the full moon."

"Just the two of you." Youngjae adds.

"It isn't like that." Yugyeom says. "Really."

"But do you want it to be like that?" Jihyo asks.

"No." Yugyeom answers. "He's my friend."

"He's three summers older than you." Youngjae says carefully. "It's just... a little unusual how close you two are."

"Is there something wrong with our friendship?"

"Not at all." Jihyo jumps in, cutting off Youngjae. "It's just unusual. It's not bad."

"You care a lot about him." Youngjae says. Yugyeom nods.

"But I don't like him like that." Yugyeom says. It's the truth. Jinyoung is handsome but he's promised to Jaebum. He's unaccessible.

"Well. I hope you have a good time with him on the full moon." Jihyo says, smiling at Yugyeom. "I'll get extra of Youngjae's mom's food!" Yugyeom snorts.

"I'm glad you're making the most of your time without me." He says before the conversation shifts to something else.

\--

Before he falls asleep that night Yugyeom finds himself thinking about his earlier conversation with Youngjae and Jihyo. Yugyeom had never stopped to think that his friendship with Jinyoung was strange. They'd just clicked. Their personalities are similar enough to get along, but different enough to see things from other perspectives. Jinyoung is kind, and he clearly likes to spend time with Yugyeom. Yugyeom likes to spend time with Jinyoung too. They're friends.

But Yugyeom can't help but think of his friendship with Jinyoung differently than his friendship with Youngjae and Jihyo. He can't quantify it but he knows that its different.

He wasn't lying when he said that he didn't want it to be anything romantic. He has no such expectations of Jinyoung. He just wants Jinyoung to be happy, and if that means spending time with Jinyoung, then Yugyeom is happy to oblige.

\--

Jinyoung is waiting at the base of the mountain path on the night of the full moon for Yugyeom, like he'd promised.

"I'm taking you to my secret lookout. Don't tell anyone." Jinyoung explains as he takes them up a small winding path that Yugyeom has never been on before. He's envious of Jinyoung's knowledge of the forest.

They end up on a small cliff overlooking the village. But the dominant sight is the looming moon.

The sight is gorgeous. It looks as if the moon is close enough to touch. Yugyeom isn't sure if he's just imagining it but it feels as if the magic is more lively tonight. As if he's more alive, more affected by it.

"Wow. It's beautiful." Yugyeom says.

"I know." Jinyoung replies. "It's always been my favourite view."

"I can see why." Yugyeom says.

They sit in silence for a long moment.

"I always wanted to be mated under a full moon like this." Jinyoung says quietly.

"You want to be mated?" Yugyeom asks.

"Doesn't everyone?" Jinyoung asks in response. "Sorry. I guess I'm feeling sentimental tonight."

"That would be romantic." Yugyeom says. "Having the mating ritual on a full moon."

"My mom says that the moon magic is fullest like this." Jinyoung says, and stretches a hand up to the sky, as if he's really going to try and touch the moon. "So then the mating bond is full of magic too."

"That makes sense." Yugyeom says. He doesn't know what it means for a mating bond to be magical, but he doesn't want to ask for fear of looking foolish.

"Do you want to be mated?" Jinyoung asks.

"I haven't really thought much about it." Yugyeom admits. "But if I met the right person, I wouldn't say no."

"Hmm." Jinyoung says.

Yugyeom wonders if he can ask Jinyoung about Jaebum. Before he can though, a tiny furry forest spirit comes and sits beside Yugyeom. He looks down at it, and it looks up at him with its big round eyes. Yugyeom wishes he was a spirit. He suspects that things would be so much easier than being a wolf.

"It likes you." Jinyoung says, looking at Yugyeom and the forest spirit. He chuckles. "Cute."

"I can't help being cute. It's just part of me." Yugyeom says and Jinyoung laughs.

"Not you you oaf! The forest spirit." Jinyoung says, slightly too loudly. The spirit makes a squeaking noise and shifts closer to Yugyeom.

"You scared it!" Yugyeom chastises. He tentatively reaches a hand out. The spirit quivers but allows Yugyeom to pat it very gently.

When he looks over at Jinyoung, Jinyoung is looking at him funnily. Yugyeom can't identify the expression on his face. Jinyoung is radiant in the moonlight, Yugyeom thinks. Of course Jinyoung has always been attractive but like this, Yugyeom finds it hard to look away.

\--

"What does it mean for a mating bond to have magic?" Yugyeom asks his mother.

"Why do you ask?" She asks. "Thinking of mating someone?"

"No!" He replies quickly. "Jinyoung just mentioned it to me and I'm curious."

"Jinyoung? As in the son of the head of the village?" She asks, raising an eyebrow. Yugyeom flushes and he doesn't know why.

"Yes."

"Well. Some bonds are closer to the magic than others. Especially if someone has the magic."

"But what does it mean?"

"It means... a more powerful connection. A stronger love." His mother replies, staring at him. "It isn't terribly common, but it does happen."

"Oh."

"Why were you talking about it with Jinyoung?"

"No reason." Yugyeom replies quickly. "He brought it up in a conversation and I wasn't sure what it meant."

"I suppose there's lots of things you don't know." His mother says, wrinkling her eyebrows. "If... if there's ever something you don't know, you can just ask your father or I."

"Mom."

"I... I'm sorry if it's hard for you that we didn't live with other wolves until now." She says, and Yugyeom recognizes guilt on her face.

"It's okay Mom." He assures her. "I had fun in the Flower Fields."

"I know you did, my little flower wolf." She says, ruffling his hair carefully. "I wish you'd still be my little flower wolf."

"Mom." Yugyeom says, flushing more, this time in embarrassment. "I'm not little."

"I know I know." She says. "Especially now you're talking about mating bonds with someone."

"Mom!" Yugyeom shrieks. His mother just laughs and laughs.

\--

Somehow time flies. Yugyeom's eighteenth summer passes. Then his nineteenth. Jinyoung's twenty-first summer passes. Then his twenty-second. He hasn't presented.

Jinyoung's father sends him away one spring to a doctor in the south, to see if she can do something. Jinyoung returns a few weeks later looking pale, thin, and put-upon. And he hasn't presented.

Yugyeom can see that it upsets Jinyoung. He hears the whispers around the village. Jinyoung sticks close to Jaebum, Sungjin, and Wonpil. He doesn't speak to Yugyeom about anything about it though, and Yugyeom doesn't ask.

Jinyoung is the first in the history of Moon Village to wait so long to present. That must be a heavy burden to carry, Yugyeom thinks.

\--

"So. Jinyoung hasn't presented." His father says to Yugyeom one day when they're alone together.

"He hasn't." Yugyeom says.

"He's getting older hmm?"

"Yeah. He's... upset about it." Yugyeom admits. "I'm trying to be supportive but there's only so much I can do."

"You seem upset about it too." His father replies softly. "I know you're close to him."

"We're friends." Yugyeom says.

"Being his friend is what he needs." His father says, and pats Yugyeom's arm comfortingly.

"Do you remember what I asked you and mom? About not presenting?" Yugyeom asks and his father nods. "Is it true? That maybe someone could be waiting for someone?" He asks quietly. His father pauses for a moment.

"The magic... it ties people together in funny ways. Especially if one person has more of the magic, it can affect other things. I don't understand how it works. But... before my family moved away from our pack, we knew a couple that paired because of the magic. They were two alphas, and one didn't present until the other did. The healer said that it was the magic that "

"You used to live in a pack?" Yugyeom asks. He's never heard his father talk much about his childhood.

"Just for a little while." His father confirms.

"So two people could be waiting for one another." Yugyeom says quietly. He wonders if that's what has happened to Jinyoung. If he's waiting for someone else to present. Yugyeom gets a strange feeling at that thought.

"They could be." His father says. "I think you're more worried about Jinyoung's presentation than your own. What you should really be worried about are your chores." He chides with a smile.

"I'm not!" Yugyeom protests, but he realizes that his father has a point. His own presentation is approaching soon, but he isn't bothered at all. "I'll go get the water from the well now though."

\--

As the winter slowly shifts into Yugyeom's twentieth spring, a girl begins to show interest in Yugyeom. It's his first time experiencing such a thing. She bats her eyelashes at him, and stutters when he speaks to her. It's flattering, even if Yugyeom doesn't quite reciprocate the feelings.

One day he finds himself in the same building as Jeongyeon -- Yugyeom on the way to fetch some herbs for his mother and Jeongyeon collecting some wood pieces.

"Oh! Yugyeom. I didn't know you'd be here." Jeongyeon says, stumbling over some of her words.

"Jeongyeon." Yugyeom greets back. She's blushing. "How are you?"

"I'm good. How are you?" She asks. She really is quite pretty, Yugyeom thinks.

"I'm good. Are you ready for the spring blossom ceremony?"

"I am." She says. "It'll be my last one ceremony as an unpresented wolf."

"That's exciting." Yugyeom replies, smiling at her.

"Are you taking anyone to the ceremony?"

"I don't think so." Yugyeom says, and ignores the disappointed look on Jeongyeon's face. It's clear that she wanted him to ask her. "But I'll see you there."

"You will." She says, brightening up instantly. "Oh. I should go. The carpenter needed my help. I'll see you around then."

"See you." Yugyeom says, and turns to continue on his way to the forest.

Right in front of him though, Jinyoung is standing not twenty steps away, staring as if he's seen a ghost goblin or something. Yugyeom absently wonders how much of his conversation Jinyoung overheard.

"What is it?" Yugyeom asks. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Jinyoung says brusquely, but Yugyeom gets the sense that isn't the whole truth.

"Jinyoung-"

"She's very pretty." Jinyoung interrupts.

"Do you want me to talk to her for you?" Yugyeom asks and Jinyoung almost chokes.

"What? No! I meant for you!" Jinyoung sputters out.

"For me?" Yugyeom asks, confused. "Why would I be interested?"

"Because she's pretty?"

"That isn't enough for me to be interested." Yugyeom says dismissively.

"Oh." Jinyoung replies in an odd voice. "But-"

"I'm not interested in courting anyone." Yugyeom says. "Not until I present."

"Why?" Jinyoung asks. "Status shouldn't matter."

"I know. But I don't want to court anyone until I know I can be serious."

"And you'll be serious when you present?"

"Serious enough." Yugyeom says and Jinyoung scoffs.

"Serious enough to what? Bed her?"

"That's not what I mean and you know it." Yugyeom says flatly and Jinyoung flushes. "I can take care of someone when I present. No matter what I present as." He adds.

"You're ridiculous." Jinyoung says, but he doesn't seem as annoyed as he did before.

\--

The spring blossom ceremony draws closer. The first buds are out on the trees, and Yugyeom can feel the way the world is changing from one season definitively into the next.

"Are you really not taking anyone?" Jinyoung asks Yugyeom.

"I'm not taking anyone." Yugyeom confirms.

"Jeongyeon would go with you if you asked." Jinyoung says, and Yugyeom eyes him curiously.

"I know she would." He says. "But I'm not going to ask her."

"Is there anyone you want to ask?" Jinyoung presses.

"Does it matter?" Yugyeom asks, even though he can think of no one other than Jinyoung that he'd like to take to the ceremony. But Jinyoung would say no.

"Whatever." Jinyoung says. He doesn't appear as unbothered as his words would suggest.

\--

The spring blossom ceremony arrives. Yugyeom realizes that this too will be his last spring blossom ceremony until his presentation. The spring blossom ceremony celebrates the transition from buds into full blooms -- the shift from winter to summer, from sleep to waking. He supposes that it's a similar transition for him.

Faintly, Yugyeom thinks that the cherry blossoms would make beautiful flower crowns. But he suspects that the other wolves would laugh at him.

He takes his place among everyone else, before Jinyoung's mother. She performs the ceremony beautifully like always -- singing and praying for a bountiful summer and praising the magic for bringing sunshine and blooms so well.

Jeongyeon is in a pale pink hanbok today. She looks beautiful, Yugyeom thinks. He smiles at her and she smiles back. He can see Jeongyeon start to approach him, but Yugyeom finds himself being tugged away.

"What?" He asks, looking to find Jinyoung pulling him aside. "Jinyoung? What are you doing?"

"Look at the cherry blossoms with me." Jinyoung says firmly, hand tight on Yugyeom's arm.

Yugyeom lets himself be led among the cherry blossom trees. Jinyoung eventually lets go, and walks just slightly ahead of Yugyeom.

Jinyoung is oddly quiet for the whole walk. He seems preoccupied. Yugyeom catches some of the falling cherry blossoms in his cupped hands.

"Things are going to turn out hyung." Yugyeom says, and Jinyoung's head jerks to look at him.

"What?"

"Just... thinking out loud." Yugyeom says and looks up the blooming branches. He thinks about how Jinyoung would look in a cherry blossom flower chain -- how the light pink would look with Jinyoung's pink lips.

"You're too much." Jinyoung says with a gentle snort, and they continue along their walk.

Just as they're almost back to the shrine, Jinyoung's father ambles toward them on the path.

"There you are." He says, looking at both of them.

"Father." Jinyoung acknowledges.

"Can you come find me in a few minutes Jinyoung?" He asks and Jinyoung nods. Yugyeom nods to Jinyoung's father, who nods back. "I need to do something quickly and I'll join you at the house."  
  
Then, just as soon as Jinyoung's father is out of sight, Jaebum appears. Yugyeom can see the way Jinyoung's body tenses.

"I was looking for you." Jaebum says.

"I've been around." Jinyoung replies.

"Do you want to look at cherry blossoms with me?" Jaebum asks. "They're your favourite."

"Sorry hyung." Jinyoung answers apologetically. "I have to go find my father. Another time."

"Alright." Jaebum acknowledges, eyes flicking between Yugyeom and Jinyoung, no doubt wondering what Yugyeom is doing there. He continues on his way, leaving Jinyoung and Yugyeom alone.

"Jeongyeon was there today. There's still time to go back to her." Jinyoung says finally.

"You should go find your father." Yugyeom says. "I'm going to help my mother." Jinyoung's face tightens inexplicably.

"I'm going." Jinyoung says, and leaves on the path back towards the village.

Yugyeom didn't know that Jinyoung liked cherry blossoms that much. He wonders why he asked Yugyeom to go look at them with him. There's so much about Jinyoung -- Yugyeom is coming to realize -- that he doesn't understand.

\--

Yugyeom presents early in his twentieth summer. He wakes up one bright morning not long after the spring blossom ceremony and he knows something is wrong.

As soon as he's conscious, he's aware that his body doesn't feel right. His limbs feel as if they aren't quite working properly. His nose feels congested. His eyes seem hyper sensitive.

He tries to sit up. And then suddenly, everything hurts. It hurts like nothing he's ever felt before in his life.

He loosely realizes that he's crying. There's a shooting pain down his back. He screams.

His mother appears in front of him, but Yugyeom can't seem to form words. He reaches a hand out towards her.

"Yugyeom?" His mother asks in horror, before something registers in her face. "Oh. You're presenting."

Another piercing pain rolls over his body. Yugyeom whines.

"Relax Gyeom." His mom whispers. "Shh. It's okay." Yugyeom still feels the snot coming out of his nose. Everything hurts so badly. His limbs don't even feel properly connected to his body.

He doesn't know how long he lies there for, feeling miserable.

"You're presenting as an alpha." He hears, and looks up to see Jaebum standing in the door, Jinyoung hovering slightly behind him.

"I am?" He asks. It feels hard to make sounds come out as words.

"Yes." Jaebum says.

"Here." Jinyoung says, coming into the room to sit beside Yugyeom. He has a bowl and a cloth. Yugyeom watches in slow motion as Jinyoung lays the wet cloth across his forehead. Whatever is in the water has a scent that Yugyeom can't place. It smells good though. It smells comforting. Yugyeom smiles at Jinyoung.

"Thank you." Yugyeom says, and then there's a clattering noise.

"What's-"

"Go!" Jaebum says firmly.

"Hyung I'm-"

Yugyeom groans as a wave of something hits him.

"Jinyoung, leave!" Jaebum says.

Faintly, Yugyeom can see Jinyoung, and then suddenly, he can't.

"Jin-" He slurs. "Where's-"

"Shh. It's okay." Jaebum says. But it isn't. Yugyeom hurts, and somehow he knows that if Jinyoung were here, he wouldn't hurt as much. If he could just-

Yugyeom falls unconscious.

—

There's murmuring.

"His presentation was bad." Someone says. Yugyeom can't place the voice.

"Worse than mine." Another voice says, maybe Jaebum, Yugyeom thinks.

He falls unconscious again.

—

When he wakes up the second time, he feels much clearer. He doesn't have any of the pain or heat of before, but rather he feels good. There's a heightened awareness of his body, like suddenly his brain is more connected to his body than before.

"You're awake." His mother says. "Congratulations -- you're an alpha." Yugyeom blinks at her in confusion. He truly hadn't been expecting that.

"An alpha?"

"Yes." She says and smiles at him. "My strong alpha son. Let's go for a run."

"But-"

"I'll show you." She says, and gestures for him to get out of bed. His legs protest the movement but he obediently follows her to a small clearing behind their house.

"So do I just... think about it?" Yugyeom asks, and his mother laughs.

"Not quite. You need to control it. Now that you've presented, you have access to the magic that will let you shift. You're always at the mercy of the magic."

"Oh." Yugyeom says, feelings dumb.

"If you focus hard enough, you can connect to the magic." His mother says. "Think." Yugyeom thinks. At first he doesn't notice anything, but if he really focuses hard he can sense a tendril of something. It burns bright and low, like the hottest embers at the bottom of a fire. Yugyeom focuses and tries to grasp at the tendril. It seems to flicker away from him.

"I can't grab it." He says, feeling frustrated.

"You need to let it go to you." His mother instructs firmly. "You don't control it."

Yugyeom tries again, focussing on the tendril, imagining himself walking slowly up to it. The tendril reaches out and wraps around Yugyeom's hand.

Suddenly, he feels a strange sensation. His body feels disconnected, and there are odd crunching noises. But Yugyeom blinks once, and then finds himself looking up at his mother.

"Yugyeom! You did it!" She says, smiling at him. Her words seem foreign to him, and he realizes that he must have shifted. It's as if the world blurred and then went back into sharper focus.

If he takes stock of the changes, he can't help but feel that they're for the better. He feels good. He feels strong. His fur is a soft warm grey, and his legs still feel long even in his wolf body.

Yugyeom weaves around his mother's legs, watching her laugh at him. Then he realizes that he can run now, and he takes off at a sprint, dashing through the forest at a pace he'd never known. He can leap and climb and run. He feels so free. It's just as good as being a child and running through the Flower Fields.

Strangest of all, he feels more connected to the magic. Where before it had simply existed around him, now he can feel the magic within himself.

After finding his way home and ravenously eating a meal, Yugyeom finds himself struck by the urge to find Jinyoung. He doesn't understand why but he wants to see Jinyoung immediately.

And then he makes his way to Jinyoung's home as if by instinct.

He's suddenly struck by an acute awareness of Jinyoung's scent. It has to be Jinyoung. It has to be, Yugyeom thinks. And somewhere in the back of his brain, he knows that Jinyoung is an omega. He doesn't understand why or how he knows this but he just does.

Jinyoung smells like... he smells amazing, Yugyeom thinks. Everyone else's scents had been subdued to his senses but not Jinyoung's. His legs feel slightly weak.

Jinyoung smells like fresh ginger, sweet honey, and a tinge of fresh rain. He smells like nothing Yugyeom has ever smelled before. Yugyeom feels himself grow dizzy with the scent.

He has to force himself not to pick up something of Jinyoung's. He wants to see Jinyoung even more now if that's even possible.

"Yugyeom?" Jaebum calls out, and Yugyeom turns around to find Jaebum behind him. Jaebum smells like fresh spring flowers and earth, not yet overpowering, nor too much. He smells clean. Like the feeling of the world after a cleansing rain.

"Where's Jinyoung hyung? I haven't seen him around yet."

"Jinyoung is spending some time at his grandparents house up by the Green Lake." Jaebum says, voice somewhat strained. "He's sick."

"Oh." Yugyeom asks. "Is he alright?" Jaebum's face tightens.

"Yes. He'll be back soon." He answers tensely.

Yugyeom just hopes that Jinyoung will recover quickly.

\--

He finds himself thinking about Jinyoung the whole time that Jinyoung is away. He has new responsibilities now that he's presented. Jinyoung's father tells Yugyeom that he can help Jaebum with patrolling and making sure that any reports of warped magic are reported right away. He has stronger senses now that he's presented, Jinyoung's father explains. And now he needs to use them to protect the village.

Yugyeom is overwhelmed by the new changes somewhat. He'd never thought that he'd be an alpha.

He wonders what Jinyoung will think when he comes back.

\--

Yugyeom is collecting firewood several days later when his grandmother suddenly materializes beside him. Yugyeom drops all the wood he's carrying.

"Grandmother? What are you doing here?"

"I knew you'd be here."

"Uh."

"And now you're an alpha hmm?" She says. "Interesting."

"Nobody really expected it." Yugyeom says.

"It is interesting, but not unexpected if you know what to look for."

"What do you mean?"

"It means that perhaps it isn't a total surprise." She says vaguely. "You'll be a strong alpha."

"I'm going to try my best." Yugyeom replies.

"Hmm. Is there someone you want to be strong for?" She asks. Yugyeom tries to keep his face impassive but his grandmother smirks. "So there is."

"Maybe." Yugyeom admits.

"Hmm. Even less of a surprise then." She says, and Yugyeom doesn't understand what that means at all. "Say hello to your parents for me." She says. "And be good."

"I'll be good." Yugyeom promises. And then somehow she disappears again, without Yugyeom even really noticing. Again, he finds himself confused by their conversation.

"Grandmother came to see me." He says to his father while they prepare dinner.

"She did?" His father asks.

"You didn't see her?" Yugyeom asks. His father shrugs.

"She does what she wants. I've long since given up trying to figure out why she does what she does."

"Oh."

"Did she say anything about where she was going?"

"No." Yugyeom says. "We just talked about my presentation. She wasn't surprised that I'm an alpha."

"Huh. Of course she wasn't." His father says with a snort.

"Why wouldn't she be?" Yugyeom asks, feeling confused.

"Your grandmother has... an unusual connection to the magic."

"Does she guess things right?" Yugyeom asks, brow furrowed and his father laughs.

"Not quite. She can... predict the future in a way." Yugyeom's jaw drops.

"What? How?"

"I'm not sure. She uses juyeok. She uses the odds and the magic and she can see certain things." His father explains. "It's very uncommon. It's why she lives up here, away from so many people."

"Do the villagers know?" Yugyeom asks and his father shakes his head.

"It's a secret." His father says, and Yugyeom finds himself even more confused than before.

\--

Yugyeom slowly grows accustomed to being a presented wolf. His shifts become smoother and he gets used to existing as a wolf. In many ways it's easier: his senses and instincts take over where his mind would if he were in a human form.

He finds that he loves it.

\--

Jinyoung comes back a few days after Yugyeom's grandmother appeared. The strange thing though, is that Yugyeom can sense Jinyoung's presence before he sees him. He just knows that Jinyoung is back.

So he finds himself walking through the forest until he finds Jinyoung.

And Jinyoung has presented as an omega. For a moment, Yugyeom is struck by the sight of him. Even though Yugyeom knows that Jinyoung doesn't look any different, there's something about him that seems markedly different.

Without even realizing that he's doing it, Yugyeom moves closer to Jinyoung. He just knows that he would feel better if he was even a little bit closer to Jinyoung. His mother told him of the urge to protect and care for but Yugyeom didn't quite know what she meant. Now, here, looking at Jinyoung, Yugyeom knows what she means. He's almost overwhelmed by a desire to make sure that Jinyoung is safe and provided for.

"Hi hyung." Yugyeom says quietly. He doesn't know why he's speaking to Jinyoung so quietly. He didn't intend on it.

"Hi." Jinyoung says in response. Jinyoung steps closer to Yugyeom. He breathes out. "How are you?" Jinyoung smells even better up close. Yugyeom tenses his fist and loosens it to try and resist the urge to bring Jinyoung closer and just breathe him in. He doesn't understand why.

"I'm good. I'm better now." Yugyeom says. "I'm an-"

"Alpha." Jinyoung says in an exhale, cutting Yugyeom off. It feels very odd to have Jinyoung acknowledge him like that.

"Er, yes." Yugyeom says. "How are you feeling? Is your illness gone? I can always ask my mom for some herbs or a spell or something." He says, feeling a frown come across his face. It makes him angry to think of Jinyoung sick.

"Fine. Good." Jinyoung answers and coughs. "It was nothing serious."

"Oh good." Yugyeom says, feeling relieved to hear that directly from Jinyoung himself.

"I presented while I was away though." Jinyoung says, as if Yugyeom can't smell it. Yugyeom nods.

"Do you feel better to know?" He asks, and Jinyoung stiffens.

"Well, I had an idea before, but it does feel good to know for sure now that I'm an omega."

"I bet." Yugyeom says.

"You're the surprise though. You could've gone any which way."

"Really?"

"I mean, it makes sense that you're an alpha though." Jinyoung muses.

"Don't say it's because I'm tall." Yugyeom says flatly.

"No. It isn't just that." Jinyoung replies. "Some things are falling into place. The way you pro- never mind."

"Never mind?"

"Never mind." Jinyoung repeats.

"How did you know that you'd be an omega?" Yugyeom asks, playing off the way that Jinyoung doesn't want to say anything more.

"Just... some things." Jinyoung answers noncommittally. He clearly doesn't want to talk about it so Yugyeom doesn't ask again.

"I didn't know I'd be an alpha." Yugyeom says. "I thought I'd be a beta. That's what I wanted to be."

"Really?" Jinyoung asks. "Why?"

"I thought it would be easier. My dad is a beta and he's always been so happy."

"It's hard to be an alpha." Jinyoung says. "Everyone expects you to be a certain way even if that isn't you."

"I just want to be myself." Yugyeom says. Jinyoung's mouth morphs into an unhappy expression. Yugyeom inexplicably wants to reach out and smooth out the lines of unhappiness on Jinyoung's face. He doesn't. "Anyways. I'm happy you're back."

"Oh. Really?" Jinyoung asks.

"Yes. I missed you." Yugyeom says, which makes Jinyoung's expression brighten.

"I... missed you too." Jinyoung admits. He seems almost embarrassed to admit it. Yugyeom doesn't understand why. It pleases Yugyeom to hear it though, that it wasn't just him thinking about Jinyoung.

\--

"Have you seen Jinyoung yet?" Youngjae asks when Yugyeom sees him later that day.

"Yeah." Yugyeom answers.

"Of course he has." Jihyo says with an eyeroll. "I think Jinyoung made a beeline right for Yugyeom."

"He did not." Yugyeom says quickly. "I went to go find him." Jihyo and Youngjae share a look. "Jinyoung hyung smells good." He says, and Youngjae all but snaps his head to face him.

"What?"

"Jinyoung hyung smells good."

"Yugyeom, I just... Don't tell anyone else you think that hmm?"

"Why not?"

"Just. Make your life easier." Jihyo says. "Trust us."

"Fine." Yugyeom grumbles.

\--

So he doesn't tell Jinyoung that he smells good. That he maybe wants to have his hands on Jinyoung. Whenever they're together, Yugyeom pretends that everything is the same as before. That they're both the same people as before.

\--

"I'm sore from going on a run yesterday." Yugyeom says one day when Jinyoung frowns at him popping his spine.

"Did you go yesterday?" Jinyoung asks, and Yugyeom nods. "With anyone?"

"No. By myself."

"I haven't gotten used to shifting yet." Jinyoung says.

"It was uncomfortable at first." Yugyeom agrees. "But I think I have the hang of it."

"What... What do you look like as a wolf?" Jinyoung asks, almost shyly.

"I can show you?" Yugyeom offers.

"I don't want to shift." Jinyoung says.

"Then you don't need to. But I can show you my shift."

"Fine. Then do it." Jinyoung replies, staring at him expectantly.

"Turn away." Yugyeom says.

"Why?"

"I'm not stripping down in front of you!" Yugyeom says.

"Prude." Jinyoung says, but he turns around anyways.

Yugyeom undresses quickly and lays his clothes at the base of a tree. Then he wills himself to shift, feeling his bones and muscles complain against the strain. And then he's a wolf.

He walks slowly over to Jinyoung, walking carefully so he doesn't scare Jinyoung. Jinyoung stares at him.

"You're big as a wolf." Jinyoung says. Yugyeom makes a noise that sounds something like a laugh. "Oh shut up."

Yugyeom lies down facing Jinyoung, head resting on his paws. He wants Jinyoung to shift too, so they can play. He rolls over, trying to show that he wants to play. But Jinyoung just laughs.

"I won't shift." He says. "Not in front of you." Yugyeom makes a whining noise. "You're just a big baby aren't you?"

Yugyeom sits up and tentatively noses into Jinyoung's hand. Jinyoung halts for a second, and then he carefully pets Yugyeom's muzzle. His touches are soft. Yugyeom wags his tail slightly and Jinyoung laughs.

"Alright, come on. I've seen what you look like. You can shift back now." Jinyoung says and turns around to give Yugyeom privacy.

"You called me a big baby." He says with a pout after he's shifted again and redressed.

"Because you are." Jinyoung replies, sticking his tongue out. Yugyeom wonders what Jinyoung looks like as a wolf. He doesn't know why Jinyoung won't shift in front of him -- he has no qualms about

"I'm not!"

"You are."

They walk in silence for a moment. Yugyeom musters up the courage to ask what he's wanted to ask since he presented.

"Hey Jinyoung? What do I smell like?"

"Dirt. And dog." Jinyoung says.

"No." Yugyeom replies with a roll of his eyes. "Like, my scent?" Oddly, Jinyoung stiffens.

"You smell gross." He says, and Yugyeom feels himself sink inwards.

"Oh." Yugyeom says, face falling. "Sorry."

"No it's just... not my favourite smell." Jinyoung says, crinkling his nose.

"Okay." Yugyeom says, trying not to feel too disappointed. He shouldn't be surprised though. Jinyoung is fated to Jaebum.

\--

Sometimes, though, Yugyeom swears that there's a kind of tension sitting between Jinyoung and himself. He doesn't know how to describe it. It isn't angry, but it isn't entirely positive. It just... ties them together. It draws Yugyeom's eyes to Jinyoung, and he swears that Jinyoung does the same. He still feels that protective urge and he has to work to quell it. He hasn't told anyone about the urge. It seems too personal, too tender. Besides, Jinyoung would never let him.

\--

He can feel it when he sees Jinyoung go out into the forest by himself. Logically, he knows that Jinyoung has been going into the forest alone for years, but now there's a tug in his chest that wants to go with Jinyoung, just to make sure that he comes back all in one piece.

"It's normal to be protective of people you care about." His mother says. "It's a strange feeling at first. But you get used to it."

Yugyeom doesn't know if he's going to get used to it.

—

But then his protectiveness comes out in a way that Yugyeom hadn't expected.

"I'm going to ask my father to let me go on border patrols." Jinyoung says one day. Yugyeom recoils.

"You shouldn't." He says firmly. "That isn't safe."

"Why not?" Jinyoung asks.

"You just shouldn't. It isn't appropriate for you as..."

"Why? Because I'm an omega?" Jinyoung asks sharply.

"I don't care that you're an omega." Yugyeom says. "It makes no difference to me. I just mean that... you need to stay safe."

"No difference? It seems as if you're making a difference." Jinyoung asks, and he looks as if he's just been slapped.

"I'm not. It doesn't matter what you are. I just think that you shouldn't go on border patrols." Yugyeom explains hastily, trying to steer the conversation back to something safer. Of course he doesn't mean that Jinyoung is limited because of his status. He just wants to keep Jinyoung safe.

"Oh right. I see." Jinyoung says, voice growing chilly. "I have to say... I didn't take you to have a bias against omegas."

"I don't!" Yugyeom insists.

"You do." Jinyoung says. "Who's worse -- you or Jaebum?"

"Hyung-" Yugyeom starts to say.

"I'm leaving." Jinyoung says. "You maybe shouldn't say that to Jeongyeon either. She won't like it." He adds, and then brushes past Yugyeom to leave, banging their shoulders together. Yugyeom could grab him and make him stay, but he doesn't. Against his instincts, he'll give Jinyoung some space.

In reality, he longs to wrap Jinyoung in his arms and never let go. He wants to apologize and make sure that he didn't hurt Jinyoung. He never wants to hurt Jinyoung. But he did.

\--

Except that every time he tries to apologize, Jinyoung brushes him off. Yugyeom brings Jinyoung's favourite tea and Jinyoung shuts the door on him. Yugyeom finds Jinyoung at the well and Jinyoung dumps a bucket of water on Yugyeom. Yugyeom even swaps tasks with Jaebum to try and get to Jinyoung. Nothing works.

\--

"It's a little funny." Youngjae admits when Yugyeom's apology is rejected for the third time. "But he'll come around."

"I don't deserve it." Yugyeom says. "I was cruel and I deserve him to ignore me."

"You're one of his best friends." Youngjae says. "You can't give up yet."

"Hey, maybe try getting him alone." Jihyo suggests. "Like when he goes to tend the shrine or something."

"I don't want to be attacked alone." Yugyeom says glumly.

"He won't attack you. He's an omega. You're an alpha."

"You're underestimating him." Yugyeom says, but he has an idea.

\--

He lies to his mother about the healing cabin being out of a night-blooming flower and then makes up an excuse that means he can't go and do it himself. Yugyeom tells his mother that Jinyoung is the only one other than him who knows what the flower looks like and just as he'd planned, his mother asks Jinyoung to do it.

So Yugyeom finds himself hiding behind a tree beside Jinyoung's house to see him leave and follow him.

He sneakily follows Jinyoung, purposely remaining about twenty paces behind Jinyoung so he won't get caught.

Jinyoung takes one path, then another, into a darker part of the forest.

Abruptly though, Jinyoung stops walking. Yugyeom stops too.

"Yugyeom." Jinyoung says flatly, without even turning around. Yugyeom stays silent, figuring that Jinyoung is bluffing, that he doesn't know that Yugyeom is really there. "I know you're there."

"I'm not." Yugyeom answers, still partially hidden behind branches.

"Are you following me?" Jinyoung asks with a heavy sigh.

"No." Yugyeom lies. And then he figures that there's no point in lying, "Yes."

"Leave me alone." Jinyoung says.

"No. I want to apologize."

"I don't want to hear it."

"But-"

"Yugyeom. I'm serious."

"Hyung." Yugyeom says pleadingly. "I'm-"

But just before he can get an apology out a loud crashing noise comes from the trees beside them, and an enormous flesh spirit leaps out of the forest. It's covered in grisly limbs from the people that it has eaten and the odour it emits makes Yugyeom's head hurt. He's never seen one in person before, he's only heard stories. He didn't think they had any around Moon Village.

"Yugyeom... What do we do?" Jinyoung asks, frozen. The flesh spirit is standing between the two of them. Yugyeom longs to grab Jinyoung and shove him behind his back.

The flesh spirit oozes something putrid and makes a strained noise.

"It's mad." Jinyoung says.

"I can tell." Yugyeom says.

"I'm going to shift." Jinyoung says, clearly steeling himself for the painful shift.

"No!" Yugyeom says. "Let me."

But it turns out that neither of them even have the chance, because the flesh spirit is lunging at Jinyoung in the blink of an eye, limbs flying.

Yugyeom can't help it — the thought of anything hurting Jinyoung makes him see red. He's half shifted before he even knows it, snarling at the flesh spirit. He slashes at it, and then it screeches, and swoops toward Jinyoung again. His Jinyoung.

Yugyeom moves toward Jinyoung. He can feel something slam into his torso but he just keeps moving. He just barely pushes Jinyoung out of the way and then he slashes his claws again, this time at the flesh spirit's throat. The screech turns into a gurgling noise and it falls to the ground with a thump. Yugyeom hears his blood pounding in his head. That was far closer than he wanted. Far too close to Jinyoung.

Jinyoung, Yugyeom thinks, and whirls around to check on him. Jinyoung is standing against a tree, shaking a little bit.

He doesn't even think, Yugyeom just strides over and wraps himself around Jinyoung. He needs Jinyoung to be alright.

Yugyeom's shoulders bracket Jinyoung's body, and he can feel Jinyoung trembling. His body is tingling in the best way where he's touching Jinyoung. His scent is filling Yugyeom's nose so that he can't even smell the lingering horrible rotten smell of the flesh spirit. He wants to embrace Jinyoung more than anything, but first he needs to make sure that he isn't hurt.

"Are you hurt?" He asks, pressing his hands over Jinyoung's body to check for bleeding. He doesn't even stop to think, he just drops to his knees and checks Jinyoung's legs too. His hands don't have any blood on them -- Jinyoung is unharmed. Yugyeom feels himself relax a little. Jinyoung is safe now. His Jinyoung is safe.

"Yugyeom, I'm okay." Jinyoung says with a voice crack, looking down at him. Yugyeom is struck by how beautiful Jinyoung looks in the moonlight. He pauses for a moment, kneeling in front of Jinyoung. If only he had any idea the extent to which Yugyeom would serve him. "Come on." He says, and tugs Yugyeom up. Yugyeom's body protests at the movement.

"Are you sure that you aren't hurt?" Yugyeom asks.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Jinyoung asks in response.

"No." Yugyeom says, but then he looks down and realizes that his abdomen is bleeding.

"You're hurt." Jinyoung says, and he sounds oddly upset.

"I'm fine." Yugyeom says. "Really." He crumples a little bit, and Jinyoung's arms reach out to catch him.

"Careful!" Jinyoung says chastisingly.

"Sorry." Yugyeom says, trying to collect himself, but he can't quite do it. His body isn't cooperating. And Jinyoung's touch feels so good. His scent, his body... He forces himself to stop being weird. Jinyoung is trying to help him.

"Are you okay to walk back to the village?" Jinyoung asks, eyes wide with worry.

"I'm fine." Yugyeom says. "But... Can you..."

"I'll help you." Jinyoung replies quickly, tightening his arm around Yugyeom.

They slowly make their way down the mountain path. Yugyeom's stomach hurts more now that the initial shock has worn off. Maybe he isn't as unaffected as he thought at first. They have to stop every so often so that Jinyoung can adjust his grip.

"You're strong." Yugyeom hears himself say. "My strong omega."

"Your what now?" Jinyoung asks with a huff. "I think you have me mixed up."

"No. I know you. You're Jinyoung. You're the best." Yugyeom blathers.

"And you're hurt." Jinyoung says with a retort.

"Okay. Yes, I am." Yugyeom replies. "Ouch." He adds as Jinyoung jostles his side to avoid a rock.

Suddenly, the village comes into sight. Yugyeom can't say how long they've been walking for.

"Jinyoung?" Yugyeom hears someone ask, and then Jinyoung is telling them to fetch Healer Kim. Yugyeom feels like his legs are going to give out at any moment, but then he smells his mother coming, her pleasant mix of herbs and her scent.

"What is it?" She asks, eyeing the two of them. Yugyeom knows that he must look a sight -- hanbok ripped, body coated in mud and bleeding from his stomach.

"Healer Kim, he needs help." Jinyoung says and Yugyeom watches his mother swoop in angrily.

"Yugyeom!" She says. "What have you done?"

"I had to... save Jinyoung." He says with a wince.

"Of course you did, you moron." Jinyoung says and Yugyeom clings a little more tightly to Jinyoung's arm.

"I don't feel good." Yugyeom says. He doesn't remember anything after that.

—

He wakes up in a bedroll in the healing building. His mother doesn't appear to be around.

His abdomen hurts, and he doesn't fully recall how he got to the healing building.

There's someone puttering around beside him. Someone that smells suspiciously like Jinyoung.

"Jinyoung? Is that you?" He asks groggily.

"I just came to check on your injuries quickly." Jinyoung says. Yugyeom feels frustration bubble up.

"Of course." Yugyeom says. "Why else would you come see me?" He asks. It isn't as if Jinyoung has any other reason to be here. He doesn't understand why Jinyoung is so mad at him.

"That's not-"

"You came. You saw. I'm fine." Yugyeom interrupts. "You can go now."

"You're bleeding through your bandage." Jinyoung says. Yugyeom looks down to see that he is in fact bleeding through his bandage. "Shit. Let me."

"You don't know how to heal."

"I know how to change a bandage."

"I can just call for my mother."

"I said I can do it!" Jinyoung exclaims, eyes blazing. Yugyeom feels his anger subside and he lies still so that Jinyoung can change the bandage. He watches Jinyoung carefully unwrap the soiled bandage and he winces as Jinyoung cleans the wound. Oddly though, every graze of Jinyoung's fingers sends a pleasant warmth up and down Yugyeom's spine. It's making the pain go away, Yugyeom realizes. He doesn't think that Jinyoung is even aware of what he's doing.

"Jinyoung." He gasps out. Jinyoung presses a clean cloth bandage to the wound and covers Yugyeom's abdomen with a blanket again.

"What?" Jinyoung asks, voice brittle. "I'm sorry it hurts."

"Do you feel that?" Yugyeom whispers. "You're making the pain go away."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Jinyoung says. "You lost lots of blood. It's making you imagine things. You should sleep."

Yugyeom reaches out and grabs Jinyoung's wrist.

"I'm not hurt enough to be making this up." He says. Jinyoung's breath hitches.

"You don't know what you're talking about." Jinyoung says, shakes free of Yugyeom's hold, and leaves the healing cabin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The shrine I refer to here is not a Korean Buddhist temple (those are different). 
> 
> Korean shamanist temples would have gates like Japanese torii (like Shinto temples). The point of temples in Korean shamanic religion were to house ancestors and provide a place to hold ancestral worship. 
> 
> Juyeok is the Korean term for i ching -- or divination.


	4. all at once you filled my eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from the song "Parallel Lines" by ATTLAS.

Yugyeom's mother forces him to stay in the healing building until he's completely healed. The healing process seems endlessly long, even though Yugyeom knows that it really only takes a few weeks. His mother fusses carefully over him the entire time. If anything, Yugyeom resolves not to get hurt again if only to avoid having deal with his mother fussing over him.

She doesn't even let anyone visit him until he's been healing for three days. Yugyeom really thinks he's going to go insane from being forced to lie still and do nothing all day.

Finally though, his friends burst through the door. 

"Yugyeom!" Jihyo and Youngjae say in unison. They have food with them, and an extra blanket. 

"Hello." He says. 

"Your mom only just let us visit you." Youngjae grumbles. 

Jihyo has some preserved fruit in her hands and she thrusts the jar towards Yugyeom. 

"For you!" She says with a smile. "My mom says to get better quickly."

"I will." Yugyeom promises. "My injury isn't so bad. My mom is just being extra careful."

"Has anyone come to visit?" Youngjae asks. Yugyeom shakes his head. He doesn't know how to explain what had happened when Jinyoung had come to visit.

"No. Just my parents." He fibs.

"Well now we're here!" Jihyo says with a smile.

"I'm glad you are. I've been going stir-crazy." Yugyeom says.

"I bet." Youngjae says. "We'll come visit you every day!"

"You don't need to." Yugyeom says, but he's pleased that his friends want to visit him every day.

"Yes we do." Jihyo says. "You think because you're an alpha now you don't need your friends huh?"

"No." Yugyeom says. "I definitely don't think that. I need you guys." He admits, and is rewarded by a grin from both of them.

They tuck into the food Youngjae brought -- Yugyeom has been surviving off broth and herbal tinctures for days now. He's ravenous.

"So." Jihyo says with a catlike smile. "You saved Jinyoung."

"I guess so." Yugyeom mutters.

"Hmm." Youngjae says. He sends a look to Jihyo that Yugyeom can only understand to mean trouble.

"It's not what you think."

"Isn't it?" Jihyo asks sarcastically. "Well. Let's just say it isn't. That you just completely platonically saved your friend. That you platonically called 'your omega'."

"I did not!" Yugyeom says.

"You did." Youngjae replies. "You were super out of it."

"I- he's not- no." Yugyeom says, sputtering slightly. "Uh. Well I definitely can't remember that."

"A shame. We can." Jihyo says with a huge grin. "And if you think that we aren't going to bring it up at every possible opportunity, then you would be incorrect."

"I'm hurt." Yugyeom says. "I'm in the healing cabin and this is how you treat me?" He pouts. Both Jihyo and Youngjae just laugh at him.

\--

Jinyoung doesn't come to see him again. Yugyeom tries and fails not to let it bother him. He'd just... he'd assumed that Jinyoung would come and check on him. Or something. Perhaps Jinyoung thinks of Yugyeom differently than Yugyeom thinks of Jinyoung.

Yugyeom grits his teeth and bears it.

At the very least, all his time left alone gives Yugyeom some time to think about how to repair his friendship with Jinyoung. He messed up. He didn't even stop to consider Jinyoung's feelings or desires. He'd been so overcome with his own stupid Alpha instincts that he made his own friend feel inferior. He's a terrible friend. Jinyoung was brave enough to tell him something, something that he knew would be difficult for an omega and when Yugyeom should've been supportive, he was destructive.

\--

As soon as his mother deems him fit to leave the healing cabin, Yugyeom finds his way to Jinyoung's father. He has only been in the head alpha's cabin once before in his entire time in Moon Village. It's a beautiful building with paper sliding doors and carved figures along the roof. It's meant to draw attention, to show the power of the head alpha and accordingly the power of Moon Village.

One of the village administrators greets him at the door and puts his shoes aside.

"Kim Yugyeom." The old man says. "How may I help you?"

"I'd like to talk to the head alpha." Yugyeom says. The man cocks his head, and stands carefully. He slides open another door leading to the inner courtyard.

"Please, go inside." The man says.

Yugyeom carefully follows the administrator around the courtyard and into another antechamber. The man nods at Yugyeom and points to the head alpha's room.

Yugyeom slides open the door. Jinyoung's fathers' presence fills the room before him and Yugyeom is reminded of just how powerful the head alpha is.

"Head alpha?" Yugyeom says in a squeak. Jinyoung's father's eyes flick up to him.

"Yes?"

"May I speak to you?" Yugyeom asks. Jinyoung's father eyes him for a moment. He puts the ledgers that he's examining down on the desk.

"You can sit down." Jinyoung's father says, and Yugyeom settles on one of the cushions in front of Jinyoung's father.

There is a long pause. Jinyoung's father is studying Yugyeom carefully and Yugyeom doesn't know how to bring up what he came here to say.

"You protected my son." Jinyoung's father rumbles finally, breaking the silence. "I owe you endless thanks."

"I just did my best." Yugyeom says. "You don't. I'd do it again without a thought."

"I'm glad to hear it." Jinyoung's father says, and he quirks a smile for the first time. "You're a good alpha." Yugyeom flushes with embarrassment. He wasn't expecting to hear such praise from Jinyoung's father. From the head alpha of Moon Village.

"Thank you." He replies. "Really. It was nothing."

"It most certainly wasn't nothing." Jinyoung's father says. "I'll remember what you've done for me."

"Thank you." Yugyeom says, bowing his head to show respect. "I have something else to say." Yugyeom adds. Jinyoung's father raises an eyebrow. "I came here to tell you that I think Jinyoung would be a great addition to the team of people who do border patrol."

"Hmm."

"He's smart, and fast. And he really wants it. I think that he would be perfect for it. He has good eyes." Yugyeom says. Jinyoung's father nods.

"I wasn't expecting you to say that." Jinyoung's father says.

"Jinyoung didn't ask me to come here and say that. But I wanted to say it anyways."

"I don't want him to get hurt." Jinyoung's father says.

"I don't either. " Yugyeom says. "But it would make him very happy to be put on border patrol."

"I'll think about it." Jinyoung's father says.

"Thank you. That's all that I ask." Yugyeom replies. He feels a small bubble of hope well up within him.

\--

Jinyoung finds Yugyeom shortly after he leaves the alpha cabin. Yugyeom is walking to the shrine when Jinyoung stops on the path in front of him, eyes blazing. Yugyeom has never been happier to see Jinyoung looking at him like that.

"You spoke to my father." Jinyoung says simply. Yugyeom wonders how Jinyoung found out so quickly.

"I did." Yugyeom replies.

"What did you tell him?" Jinyoung demands.

"I told him that you'd make an excellent addition to the border patrol team." Yugyeom answers.

"You're lying." Jinyoung says.

"I'm not." Yugyeom says. "But you can find out later if you want."

Jinyoung is silent. Yugyeom can practically see him fighting with his emotions.

"Why did you do that?" He asks eventually.

"Because you want something and I judged it unfairly based on my feelings, not my true thoughts. And if it makes you happy, then I thought that it was the least I could do to encourage you." Yugyeom explains. Jinyoung's expression shifts. His anger dissipates.

"Oh." He says.

"I'm sorry." Yugyeom says. "I meant to apologize sooner."

"I'm... I should be the sorry one." Jinyoung says. "If you hadn't been out trying to apologize, you wouldn't have gotten hurt."

"No!" Yugyeom bursts out. "No. This isn't your fault. How were we to know that there would be a flesh spirit in the woods?"

"I suppose." Jinyoung says, as though it's difficult for him to say that.

"I didn't mean to make you think that I think differently of you because you're an omega." Yugyeom says. "I don't think that at all. I'm sorry."

"I overreacted." Jinyoung says. "I was... I was too emotional. I just... I don't like knowing that my status affects how you think of me."

"It doesn't!" Yugyeom replies quickly. "You're always Jinyoung to me. It doesn't matter what your status is. You could be an alpha and I'd still worry about you the same way."

"Yugyeom-"

"I'm serious." Yugyeom says.

"So. It doesn't make any difference to you that I'm an omega and you're an alpha?"

"No. Why would it?" Yugyeom asks in response.

"No reason." Jinyoung responds. Yugyeom wonders if Jinyoung is going to say anything else but he doesn't. He just lets Yugyeom continue on his way home.

\--

When Yugyeom gets back to his house, he finds a surprise in his room. He sets down the few things his mother had brought over to the healing cabin and sits down on his bedmat. He's contemplating having a nap when he notices two big eyes peering out at him from the blanket folded in the corner.

"What is this?" He asks and the eyes make a squeaking noise. A familiar squeaking noise. Yugyeom watches as the forest spirit from the full moon jumps up on its little legs and scurries toward him. It lets out a huff.

"What are you doing here?" Yugyeom asks and it leans against his legs. He carefully reaches out a hand and pats it. Surprisingly, it lets him. "Forest spirits don't usually like wolves so much." Yugyeom muses. "But you don't seem to mind me so much." It puffs out a breath, and leans more onto his calves.

Its fur is soft and fuzzy, and Yugyeom finds himself picking it up and resting it in his lap.

"My mom will kill me if she knows you're in here." Yugyeom mutters, but he doesn't have the heart to force it to leave.

\--

Shortly after his recovery, Yugyeom's grandmother comes back to Moon Village. This time, Yugyeom finds her at home chatting to his parents and drinking some kind of bitter smelling tea.

"Grandmother!" He says, and gently hugs her just as his parents are finishing up their conversation with her.

"Yugyeom!" She greets back. "Have you grown since I saw you last?"

"No." Yugyeom replies. "I don't think so."

"It looks like it." She says. "I know these things."

"I know you can predict the future." Yugyeom says and his grandmother smiles at him.

"Your father always was terrible at keeping secrets." She says. Yugyeom's father stifles a laugh. The air in the room changes somewhat.

"We'll give you some privacy." Yugyeom's mother says, and both Yugyeom's parents stand up from the table they're sitting around to leave Yugyeom alone with his grandmother.

Yugyeom sits, waiting. He doesn't understand how his grandmother can predict the future. He

"That friend of yours... You care about him?" His grandmother says out of the blue. Yugyeom blinks.

"Which one?" He asks because he has more than one friend.

"You know the one." His grandmother says, and Yugyeom's mind flashes to Jinyoung. "Of course you know the one." And Yugyeom knows that she knows exactly who it is.

"I do." Yugyeom confirms. "Yes. I care about him." He says.

"Mmm." His grandmother says. "The sooner you acknowledge that, the better."

"I care about him a lot. More than I should." Yugyeom admits.

"There's a long road ahead of you Yugyeom-ah." She says. "Maybe that pretty friend of yours too."

"What? What do you mean?"

"You'll find out what I mean in your own time. I can't tell you."

"Grandmother."

"You'd be wise to remember how much you care about him." She says.

"Of course I'll remember." Yugyeom says. "I don't imagine how I could forget that I care about him."

"Good." She says, and grimaces slightly.

"What is it?" He asks.

"Nothing." She replies quickly. "Well. It isn't nothing but I can't tell you what it is."

"Why not?" Yugyeom asks.

"I can see the future." She says. "But I can't change it." Yugyeom's brow wrinkles in confusion. "Did your father not explain that?"

"No." Yugyeom answers and she sighs.

"I can connect to the magic in a different way than when I shift. That's how I can see the future -- through the magic."

"Do you reach out to it the same way that we shift?" Yugyeom asks. His grandmother shakes her head.

"It comes to me. I don't have a choice."

"But you can't... change it?"

"No. The magic understands what's going to happen, which is how I can see. But I don't have the power to change anything. It's entirely up to the magic to decide what will happen." She explains. Yugyeom feels his head reeling. He'd heard bits and pieces of rumours of such a thing but to know that his own grandmother can tap into the magic like that is something else entirely.

"When did you find out that you can see the future?" He asks.

"When I was a child." She says, and for a moment there's a forlorn look on her face. Yugyeom wonders what memory made her look like that. "I was very young. It was... scary at first." Yugyeom wants to press further. Wants to ask more about what happened, about how her connection evolved. He wonders if this connection has anything to do with why his family always lived away from other wolves. He wonders if his parents-

"Are you going to leave soon?" Yugyeom asks instead, clearing his throat.

"I think I'm going to stick around for some time now." His grandmother says. "I have a feeling that I'm going to be needed here."

\--

"My father assigned me to border patrol duty." Jinyoung tells Yugyeom a few days later. His eyes are sparkling with happiness.

"Did he?" Yugyeom asks.

"Thank you." Jinyoung says. "You didn't need to talk to him but you did."

"It doesn't matter whether it was necessary or not. I wanted to because it was important to you."

"Yugyeom." Jinyoung says. "Thank you."

"You're welcome hyung." Yugyeom replies with a warm smile. Jinyoung looks at him, and takes a step closer. His scent grows stronger.

"I won't... I won't forget that you've done this." Jinyoung promises.

"You should. It isn't a big deal." Yugyeom says with a laugh. Jinyoung doesn't laugh back.

"I... Just... Thank you." Jinyoung repeats, somewhat awkwardly. Yugyeom smiles and Jinyoung smiles weakly back.

\--

There's something sitting heavily between them, Yugyeom thinks. Something that he doesn't fully understand. Jinyoung seems to understand it better, but he doesn't seem to want to talk about it.

Yugyeom wonders if life would be simpler if he wasn't a wolf. Perhaps it isn't too late to run away and live with the field spirits.

\--

Jinyoung begins border duty the next moon. Yugyeom worries but he reminds himself to respect Jinyoung's boundaries.

"I just don't want him to get hurt." He tells the forest spirit when they're curled up for bed. It used to wait until Yugyeom fell asleep to sneak into the blankets but Yugyeom gave up and just lets it settle in for bed when he does. Besides, it likes to snuggle.

It blinks at him. Yugyeom sighs.

"I know. I know." He says. "Jinyoung is strong. He can take care of himself. I'm overstepping."

Yugyeom does know. He knows just how cunning and industrious Jinyoung is. He's going to be successful no matter what he does. Jinyoung is independent and strong. He can get himself out of lots of dangerous situations.

But still. Yugyeom wouldn't hesitate to save Jinyoung, even despite knowing all that. There's a section of his heart dedicated just to Jinyoung, and Yugyeom doesn't fully understand what that means. All he knows is that he'll protect Jinyoung as long as Jinyoung wants him to.

\--

Yugyeom is restless one day when he's out doing chores. Lately he's been tasked with digging some holes for storing the kimchi jars and other fermented things, and his body aches with a desire to shift into his wolf form. He's been so busy with work that by the time he finishes, he just wants to go home and sleep.

"What's with you?" Jinyoung asks. "You look like you're about to jump out of your skin."

"I'm restless." Yugyeom admits. "I want to shift and run."

"Why don't you then?" Jinyoung asks. "I'll cover for you." He adds, and Yugyeom remembers when he did that for Jinyoung.

"Run with me?" Yugyeom asks. Jinyoung pauses. Yugyeom is expecting Jinyoung to say no. He knows that Jinyoung knows what he expects.

"Okay." Jinyoung agrees after a beat. Yugyeom does a slight double-take.

"Really?"

"Yes." Jinyoung says. "Now turn around."

They quickly strip and hide their clothes in some bushes by the shrine. Yugyeom reaches out and feels for the magic, letting himself go to it to shift.

When he finishes, he finds Jinyoung waiting for him. Jinyoung as a wolf is snowy white, with tufts of grey sprinkled in with his white fur. He's beautiful, not that Yugyeom should be surprised. If he were still in human form, his jaw would've dropped, Yugyeom knows it.

Jinyoung is smaller than him, but still powerful looking. He watches Jinyoung approach him slowly, sniffing carefully. Yugyeom cocks his head to the side. And then Jinyoung takes off at a run, and Yugyeom finds himself following him.

They race off through the forest -- leaping over fallen trees and roots, splashing through the small creeks, and over the meadows. Yugyeom is a strong wolf, and his long legs translate to a powerful stride. Jinyoung is faster though, his smaller size giving him the advantage speed-wise.

The air feels cleaner, and Yugyeom feels centred within himself like this. Life is simple as a wolf. He just exists here, exists with his friend, the two of them just having fun.

Jinyoung pauses in one of the larger meadows, one that the two of them have been to many times before for herbs. The sky is infinitely blue above them and Yugyeom feels very young.

Jinyoung lets Yugyeom come close to him and then he lies down. Yugyeom lies down too. He doesn't want to stand over Jinyoung. And then Jinyoung lunges on him, jaw open and snarling. He doesn't mean any harm, Yugyeom realizes, he just wants to play. So Yugyeom plays back. He's gentle of course -- he doesn't want to harm Jinyoung.

They tussle on the ground, rolling over each other in a pile of paws and legs. Yugyeom allows Jinyoung to be on top of him, to feel as if he's in control. Then, just as Yugyeom senses that Jinyoung is tired of playing, he flips them around so that he's hovering over Jinyoung. Jinyoung blinks up at him, a smudge of dirt on his white face from rolling around in the dirt. Like this, it almost feels as if Yugyeom has Jinyoung. Just for a moment.

Jinyoung is on his back for a split second longer before he twists around and gets up, forcing Yugyeom off him with a burst of strength.

\--

"Did you have fun today?" Yugyeom asks once they've made their way back to the village, shifted, and changed back. His body feels sated, like some base need has been satisfied.

"I did." Jinyoung confirms. "That was... it felt good."

"It felt good for me too." Yugyeom replies. "I was restless."

"Mmm." Jinyoung says.

"You're pretty." Yugyeom says then. "As a wolf."

"Thank you." Jinyoung says. Yugyeom can sense his discomfort. He doesn't want to say something else to make Jinyoung feel even more uncomfortable.

They walk back to the village in silence, but Jinyoung sticks close to Yugyeom. As they approach Jinyoung's house, Yugyeom can feel someone's gaze. He looks up to see that Jaebum is watching them with strange, heavy eyes. Yugyeom doesn't know what to make of it.

The thing between them grows heavier.

\--

 

Yugyeom is at a communal meal the following moon with Jihyo and Youngjae when Jeongyeon approaches him. She had been avoiding him after the spring blossom ceremony, and Yugyeom has a feeling that it has something to do with Jinyoung's odd behaviour.

"Can I... talk to you?" She asks him quietly. He nods, and lets her lead them to a quiet patch of trees away from the crowd. She's grown more beautiful with her presentation as an omega. She'd presented late, he recalls his mother saying.

"What is it?" Yugyeom asks gently. Jeongyeon bites her lip.

"Are you courting anyone?" She asks, looking up at him suddenly. Yugyeom sucks in a breath.

"No." He answers.

"Are you available to court then?" She asks. Yugyeom can smell an increase in her scent -- she smells like berries and oranges.

"I'm not." He says. "I'm not interested in anyone."

"Oh." She replies, looking crestfallen. "But-"

"Jeongyeon, I'm flattered." He says gently. "But I'm really not looking for anything right now."

"Okay." She says. "Well. Thank you for letting me know."

"I'm sorry." He says. "You're very beautiful. You won't struggle to find someone to court you."

\--

When he gets back to dinner, he finds Jinyoung sitting there with his friends too. Jinyoung is pointedly not looking at Yugyeom.

"What did she want?" Youngjae asks, looking incredibly amused.

"She wanted to ask if I was courting anyone. If I was available to court." Yugyeom replies, feeling his whole body flush. There's no way that his friends won't make fun of him.

"And obviously you are." Jinyoung says. "Or else you wouldn't have even spoken to her."

"Good grief. I'm being polite. I told her that I'm not interested in courting right now."

"Why not? You've presented?" Jinyoung grills and Yugyeom is aware of his friends carefully taking the scene in. "You can court whoever you want."

"But then I'd have to have someone to want to court." Yugyeom reminds him.

"Whatever." Jinyoung mutters. "Well. She's brave to approach you like that. She must really want to court you."

"It's harmless." Yugyeom says with a laugh.

"You reek like her." Jinyoung says, pinching his nose. Yugyeom knows that he's exaggerating. There's only a faint whiff of her on him, just like what happens when he speaks to any presented wolf.

"Yugyeom is a desirable mate." Youngjae says with a shrug. "I guess people are starting to see that."

"Desirable? Where?" Jinyoung asks with a scoff and Yugyeom feels a pang of self-consciousness. He knows that he isn't like Jaebum, or Jinyoung's father. He isn't the strongest, or holds the most power in the pack. But still. He's strong enough. He's learned how to heal from his mother. He can cook decently. He'd take good care of whoever he mated with. He'd love them forever.

It hurts more to hear that from Jinyoung. Because Yugyeom wants to be desirable for Jinyoung in particular. He doesn't need to be desirable as a mate to anyone else as long as Jinyoung wanted him.

"Desirable everywhere." Jihyo says fiercely. "Yugyeom is a great person. Anyone would be lucky to mate with him." She adds, glaring at Jinyoung. Yugyeom feels a rush of affection for his friends.

"Right." Jinyoung says. "Well. I have to report for border duty, so I'll leave you to your friends Yugyeom."

"I'll see you later." Yugyeom says, but Jinyoung has already left.

"Wow. Was that the weirdest encounter you've ever had with him or was that the weirdest encounter you've ever had with him?" Jihyo muses.

"It was very weird." Youngjae says. "He was... definitely jealous there for a moment and then he got all weird."

"Jealous?" Yugyeom asks. "Of Jihyo?"

"Yeah." Jihyo says. She sighs. "Of everyone, why is it that you like him Gyeom-ah?"

"I don't like him!" Yugyeom replies quickly. Of course he doesn't. He's just... attracted to his friend sometimes.

"Right." Youngjae says, raising an eyebrow. "You definitely don't."

"I don't." Yugyeom says but he can sense that his argument is futile. Youngjae and Jihyo are sending each other looks.

"He was rude to you though." Jihyo says. "He more than anyone would recognize you as a desirable mate." Yugyeom flushes at Jihyo's words.

"He doesn't. Clearly." Yugyeom says quietly. Jihyo sends him a sad look.

"It's... He does." She says but even she must not believe her own words because they fall into silence for the rest of the meal.

Jinyoung genuinely gives him whiplash. One second he's getting jealous, the next he's telling Yugyeom that he isn't a desirable mate.

\--

Jinyoung approaches him at home the next morning. He's clearly just come off patrolling the borders because he looks tired and soft.

"I'm sorry." Is the first thing Jinyoung says when Yugyeom opens the door.

"I know." Yugyeom replies. "But you didn't need to be rude in front of my friends."

"I'm sorry." Jinyoung repeats. "I... I don't know what came over me." Yugyeom sighs.

"It's okay hyung. It's okay." He says, but he isn't sure if it is. Jinyoung was really quite rude.

"It isn't." Jinyoung says.

"Hyung. You came here to apologize. It's fine. Would you like to come in and eat something before you go to sleep?"

"Yes please." Jinyoung says meekly.

Jinyoung goes to take a step into the house and somehow he miscalculates the distance and his weight falls backwards. Yugyeom reaches out before he even realizes, grasping Jinyoung's arms and pulling him forwards and hauling him up into Yugyeom's chest. Jinyoung isn't particularly heavy. Yugyeom lifts him inside the house. Clearly he can't be trusted to do that for himself.

A strange noise leaves Jinyoung's throat when Yugyeom puts him down. Yugyeom freezes.

"Are you alright?" He asks.

"Yes." Jinyoung answers quickly.

"You just... you made a pained noise."

"No. No. Not in pain." Jinyoung replies. He's blushing. Yugyeom stares at him. "What?"

\--

Yugyeom only realizes later. Jinyoung wasn't in pain... Jinyoung liked it when Yugyeom moved him like that. Yugyeom's eyes scrunch shut. He doesn't know how he's going to forget about that.

—

Yugyeom is walking through the woods to fetch something for his mother one day when he comes across Jinyoung and his parents in a clearing. They're fighting, even the raised voices and flushed faces are any indicator. Yugyeom can't quite make out what they're fighting about though. And besides, he reminds himself, he doesn't want to pry when Jinyoung doesn't want him to. He lingers in the shadows, staying out of view but unable to leave when Jinyoung looks so upset.

Jinyoung's mouth is tense and he says something harsh to his parents. His father says something in a low voice but Jinyoung doesn't back down. Yugyeom's eyes flick to the other side of the clearing suddenly. Jaebum is standing there -- only partially hidden. He's watching this happen too. Yugyeom watches Jaebum's reaction. He doesn't seem to be bothered by Jinyoung's obvious upset.

Jinyoung is growing more and more upset. Yugyeom can see it. He balls a hand into a fist. He wants to- he doesn't know what he wants to do. He has no business interfering in Jinyoung's family life. Jinyoung's father is the head alpha of the village.

Jinyoung's parents say one more thing and then they leave. Yugyeom can see the anger on them too. Jaebum approaches Jinyoung as soon as his parents are out of sight.

Yugyeom hangs back. Clearly Jaebum wants to comfort his friend. Yugyeom doesn't have the same place in Jinyoung's life.

Yugyeom watches Jaebum approach Jinyoung. That doesn't surprise him. What does surprise him is when Jinyoung turns and leaves Jaebum gawking after only a brief exchange of words. Yugyeom watches Jinyoung ball his hands into fists.

Before Yugyeom can stop himself, he's slipping into the forest to follow Jinyoung. He doesn't understand why, but he just knows that Jinyoung needs him right now.

He follows behind Jinyoung as he wanders along the path up towards the shrine. Jinyoung is full of anger -- Yugyeom can see it in how he's holding his body.

"What are you doing here?" Jinyoung asks flatly, not even turning around to face Yugyeom. Yugyeom wonders how Jinyoung knows that he's there. Perhaps it's the same reason that Yugyeom felt compelled to follow him.

"I saw you earlier." Yugyeom says simply.

"With my parents?" Jinyoung asks. Yugyeom nods. "Mind your business." He says harshly.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay. You looked upset." Yugyeom says.

"You didn't come to ask what we were talking about?" Jinyoung asks, as if he can't quite believe it.

"No. Because I don't care. So are you alright?" He asks again.

"I'm..." Jinyoung tapers off.

"Hyung?" Yugyeom asks. "Are you okay?" Something snaps within Jinyoung. He sniffles once and collapses against Yugyeom, letting Yugyeom support his weight. Yugyeom's eyes widen. He's never seen Jinyoung like this before.

"My parents are..." Jinyoung exhales. "Driving me crazy." He breathes into Yugyeom's chest. Tentatively, Yugyeom wraps his arms loosely around Jinyoung. He doesn't fully understand why, but it seems like Jinyoung needs a hug right now. He pats Jinyoung's back lightly. Jinyoung relaxes further into the touch, as if Yugyeom is soothing him. That makes something within Yugyeom hum. Yugyeom doesn't know how to explain the feeling that goes through his body with Jinyoung's touch. It's the strangest reaction -- as if his body can't get enough of Jinyoung's touch.

"I'm sorry to hear that." He says, for lack of a better response.

"It has nothing to do with you." Jinyoung says with a sniff. "But thank you anyways."

"I don't like seeing you sad." Yugyeom confesses, just a soft whisper. Jinyoung is silent in his arms, but he seems to squeeze Yugyeom just a little bit tighter. The feeling in Yugyeom's body grows stronger. It feels as if there are tiny tendrils of something between him and Jinyoung -- something midway between terrifying and wonderful.

Jinyoung pulls away from Yugyeom as quickly as he'd leaned in. "Er, sorry."

"It's okay." Yugyeom says. But he isn't sure if it is. It felt good to have Jinyoung in his arms like that. Like Jinyoung just fit properly.

\--

Except Jinyoung is careful not to touch Yugyeom after this. It wasn't as if they'd touched often before the incident, but the easy arms thrown over shoulders and the quick pats on backs stop.

He doesn't pull away from Yugyeom when Yugyeom talks to him, or wants to spend time with him but he's very careful to ensure that there's no contact between them.

Yugyeom finds himself oddly offended by it. He wonders if Jinyoung didn't like the sensation. Perhaps it was just Yugyeom feeling good.

\--

Yugyeom hears his parents talking in resigned voices one night as he's coming home from chores.

"-don't know how we're going to sustain it." His mother says in a hushed voice. "The king is insane to ask this of his subjects."

"You know as well as I do that it doesn't matter." His father replies with a heavy sigh. "The forge will be busy."

"We'll all be busy." His mother notes. "They say that there are spending problems in the palace. That the king can't control the ledgers."

"And what? We suffer at his expense?" His father asks. "He has people to keep track of spending for him."

"I don't know." His mother says. "When we were in the palace-"

Suddenly, Yugyeom can't hear their voices. He presses his ear to the door, but he realizes that they must've moved. He sighs. And then pauses. When were his parents in the palace?

\--  
  
"It's bad." Jinyoung says when Yugyeom asks him about the conversation he overheard. "My father was telling me that tributes are going to be four times what they usually are."

"Really?" Yugyeom asks. "Won't that be a big burden on the village?"

"It will be." Jinyoung says. "It's going to be a strain to send the tributes and have things left to trade."

"Hmm." Yugyeom replies. Moon Village is isolated from the rest of the kingdom by both the terrain and the distance from the capital, but the fact that the news comes quick which means that the situation in Hanyang must be dire, Yugyeom realizes.

He doesn't mention that his parents were in Hanyang before to Jinyoung. He doesn't know what to even do with that information. There are more secrets in his family than he expected.

\--

The preparations begin for the increase in tributes. Moon Village doesn't deal with gold or silver, so it has to rely on goods for the provision of tributes. Every craftsmen has to produce more than they usually need to, every gatherer and cook to prepare more food to be sent, and every hunter is tasked with catching extra animals for their pelts and furs. Yugyeom is put in charge of foraging for extra herbs to be sent to the capital for the imperial physicians to use.

The village bustles with work, everyone trying to get the tributes ready. They have less than a moon left until the tributes have to be off to Hanyang. It isn't much time when the villagers are already trying to get their usual work done, make the necessary preparations for their wintertime stores.

\--

Yugyeom is at home one evening after a long day of collecting herbs high up in the alpine meadows. His parents are both still at work. His mother has to deal with the physical symptoms of overwork -- sprains, tight muscles, and more cuts and bruises than usual. His father is busy at the forge, with both the tools for the tributes and the usual smith work.

The bell outside their door rings softly and Yugyeom goes to see who it is. He's somewhat surprised to see Jinyoung, he'd thought that he'd be working this time of day.

"Oh, hyung. What are you doing here?" He asks.

"I just finished with work and I thought I'd come see you." Jinyoung says, and Yugyeom suddenly realizes that something about Jinyoung is definitely off. His eyes are somewhat unfocused but he's staring at Yugyeom as if he's some kind of delicious treat.

"Hyung?" Yugyeom says. "Are you alright?"

"I'm good." Jinyoung answers, voice taking on a strange tone.

"You look a little off."

"Do I?" Jinyoung asks and something crackles off his hand. Yugyeom steps backwards.

"What was that?" He asks Jinyoung. Jinyoung quickly clasps his hands behind his back and steps in close to Yugyeom so that he can practically nuzzle into Yugyeom's neck. They aren't touching but Yugyeom can feel the beginnings of that strange sensation from before, when his body had tingled and burned at Jinyoung's touch. Jinyoung's breath is warm on his skin, and he's quiet, just breathing. Breathing in Yugyeom, it looks like. He's never seen Jinyoung act like this around anyone.

"You smell... strong." Yugyeom says awkwardly, to try and break the silence.

"Oh." Jinyoung says, and wiggles away from him slightly. "Sorry."

"No. No. It's fine. It... you smell- you don't smell bad." Yugyeom stutters out. "Um."

After a beat, Jinyoung asks something he's never asked Yugyeom before.

"Do I smell good then?" He asks quietly. Yugyeom pauses. It's clear that Jinyoung doesn't reciprocate his attraction. He doesn't want to make Jinyoung uncomfortable. So he decides to lie.

"You smell... okay." Yugyeom answers.

"Okay?" Jinyoung asks.

"Yeah. Like, you know, just like anyone else." He settles on adding.

"Right. Just like anyone else." Jinyoung mutters. For a second, Yugyeom wonders if he's disappointed. But he can't be. He's probably just relieved to hear that.

Yugyeom takes a step back.

"What are you doing?" He asks. Jinyoung then bares his neck to Yugyeom again. The soft expanse of skin suddenly appears incredibly inviting, Yugyeom thinks.

"What do you think I'm doing?" Jinyoung asks. His scent flares. Yugyeom takes another step back. Jinyoung steps forward to maintain the close distance between them.

"Stop that." He says. "Stop what you're doing."

Jinyoung glares at him, some strange emotion in his eyes. Yugyeom stares at him back. He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't understand what Jinyoung is doing. It's almost as if he's submitting slightly to Yugyeom. But Jinyoung has never submitted to anyone.

"Never mind." Jinyoung says. "I'm going to-"

"Stop." Yugyeom interrupts. "Where are you going?"

"Away from you." Jinyoung replies angrily. His eyes flash with something close to tears.

"Hyung!" Yugyeom says. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong! Everything is fine!" Jinyoung says. "God!"

"It doesn't seem fine-"

"Maybe if you opened your eyes, then you'd see what was right in front of you!" Jinyoung hisses, interrupting Yugyeom.

And then he turns to leave and once again Yugyeom finds himself staring at Jinyoung's retreating back.

\--

He lies in bed that night thinking about Jinyoung. He can't shake the suspicion that Jinyoung was somehow submitting to him. He knows that omegas do that to alphas when they feel safe and protected, but Jinyoung isn't just any omega. He's... Jinyoung. He's headstrong and independent. He doesn't need to be protected by anyone. So what was Jinyoung doing?

The forest spirit snuffles and kicks him gently with one of it's little legs in sleep. Yugyeom sighs and pets it softly. At least he understands one creature in this village.

\--

The next day Yugyeom finds out why Jinyoung was acting so strangely.

"Have you seen Jinyoung?" He asks his mother. "I haven't seen him around all day."

"Jinyoung is in a Warmth." His mother says. "He visited the healing cabin earlier for pain but he's just resting at home now."

"Oh." Yugyeom says. His head is swirling. Of course he knew that his mother and the other people who help in the healing cabin manage the pain and other side effects of Warmths, but it feels very different when he knows that they're taking care of Jinyoung. He doesn't like knowing that Jinyoung is in pain.

\--

That night Yugyeom has a dream where Jinyoung is calling out to him in the dark forest. But no matter what dream-Yugyeom does, he can't quite reach Jinyoung. Instead, he watches dream-Jinyoung get carried away by some strange creature that Yugyeom has never seen before. The last thing that he sees is Jinyoung's hand reaching out for him. Yugyeom extends a hand but he watches Jinyoung's arm get wrenched away by the creature.

Yugyeom wakes up with a start. His heart is pounding and he's sweating into his blanket. He forces himself to take some deep breaths.

He misses Jinyoung. It's been a week since they last spoke and he misses Jinyoung. Yugyeom settles back into his blankets with a sigh. His forest spirit is still fast asleep. He watches it breathe for a few moments, trying to calm himself.

Yugyeom wants to be near Jinyoung -- he can't help himself. He has the unignorable desire to protect Jinyoung from any wolf that would dare come near him during this vulnerable time. There's a deep, hidden part of Yugyeom that particularly wants to keep Jaebum away from Jinyoung.

A deeper part of him still wants to be the one seeing Jinyoung in the throes of Warmth. Wants to see Jinyoung writhing under his fingers. Want to be the one to replace Jinyoung's pain with another sensation altogether. Wolves have Warmths to encourage... breeding. And if Jinyoung is pretty as is... Yugyeom doesn't even want to imagine him in Warmth -- cheeks flushed, skin glowing, and mouth cast open.

He recalls how Jinyoung reacted when Yugyeom manhandled him. He wonders how far Jinyoung would let him take control...

He's always been protective over Jinyoung, so these feelings aren't new, but the extent to which his instincts affect him has definitely grown.

Yugyeom is finding it harder and harder to look anywhere but at Jinyoung.

He stops himself. Jinyoung isn't even currently speaking to him.

\--

Yugyeom is hovering outside the healing cabin the next day, trying to appear nonchalant, when his mother finds him.

"Jinyoung just left." His mother says. "He needed some more pain medication." Yugyeom wonders quickly if he should contest that he's been caught looking for Jinyoung. His mother knows him too well though.

"Is he alright?" He asks instead.

"He's fine." His mother says, and then her tone changes. "Omegas aren't invalids. They just have some pain during their Warmth."

"But-"

"He's fine. He's just resting at home." She says and touches his arm. "You don't need to be like this. He's a grown-up."

"I know." Yugyeom says. He does know. He just can't quite stop himself from worrying about Jinyoung anyways.

"Are you going to go see him?"

"I- no." Yugyeom says. He wants to see Jinyoung more than anything, but Jinyoung doesn't want to see him.

"So I shouldn't ask you to deliver some more herbs to him?" His mother asks. Yugyeom's heart leaps at the question.

"I shouldn't." He says. "We... We fought."

"Hmm." His mother says. "Anything you want to share?"

"No." Yugyeom says. "But I don't think he's very happy with me."

"I don't know." She says slowly. "I think he'd accept your delivery though."

"I don't want to make things worse."

"I might not be able to see the future but I don't think that you will." She says.

So Yugyeom finds himself on the path to Jinyoung's house, herbs in hand.

He rings the little bell hanging by the front door and prays that it isn't Jinyoung's father who will answer the door.   
  
Jinyoung opens the door though.

"Yes?" Jinyoung asks, and then he realizes who it is and his face tightens. Yugyeom hates the effect he has on Jinyoung. Even so, just being able to take in Jinyoung's scent is something of a relief.

Jinyoung looks slightly paler than usual and he's only dressed in his sleeping clothes, but he really does look fine. A sense of relief comes over Yugyeom just at the confirmation that Jinyoung is managing his Warmth well.

"What are you doing here?" Jinyoung asks with a heavy sigh.

"I'm here to deliver these." Yugyeom answers, holding up the sachets. Jinyoung scowls at him.

"They're from my mother. And I'm leaving right away, I swear." Yugyeom puts the herbs down on the table and turns to leave. He can already sense that he isn't wanted here.

"Wait!" Jinyoung calls out. Yugyeom turns slowly. "You can... you can come in for some tea if you want." Jinyoung says. He looks sad, Yugyeom realizes.

"Only if you want me to." He says. Jinyoung swallows.

"I-I want you to." Jinyoung says. Yugyeom can't fight the smile that comes over his face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tributes were the kind of taxes that citizens would've paid to the king.


	5. can’t replace the times you didn’t stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 🥺

Yugyeom settles down on a cushion in the main greeting room of Jinyoung’s home. It overlooks a small inner courtyard with a colourful garden of flowers growing in neat rows. 

He looks at all the different flowers while Jinyoung prepares a fresh pot of tea for them. 

“Thank you.” Yugyeom says and takes the cup after Jinyoung has poured it for him. “That’s a beautiful little garden you have.” 

“Oh. It’s my mother’s.” Jinyoung replies. “I’ll tell her you like it.” 

“She has a good eye for growing flowers together properly.” Yugyeom says. Jinyoung’s jaw hardens slightly, and Yugyeom can’t decipher why.  

“Thank you. For bringing me more herbs.” Jinyoung says suddenly. “I… It’s different for me. To have times like this.” 

“I imagine.” Yugyeom says. He just knows that Jinyoung hates to have to go through Warmths. For someone so used to always doing what he wants, feeling trapped by the constraints of his physiology must feel incredibly frustrating. “I’m here for you though, whatever you need.” 

“Thank you.” Jinyoung replies, voice going a little hoarse. 

They finish the pot of tea in relative silence. Jinyoung looks content and Yugyeom doesn’t want to ruin that mood.

But just as Yugyeom stares at him to make sure that he’s doing alright, Jinyoung’s scent grows stronger, and Yugyeom realizes that he must be experiencing a wave of Warmth. A wave of need. 

“I’ll go after I drink this cup. I don’t want to keep you long.” Yugyeom says, face blushing. It’s hardly proper for an alpha to be alone around an omega in Warmth.

But Jinyoung... Jinyoung's hand is wrapped tightly around Yugyeom’s arm. Yugyeom hadn’t even realized that Jinyoung had reached out for him. 

"Please don't go." Jinyoung says softly. "I'm in pain and you... you distract the pain away." 

Yugyeom's heart freezes. He knows that he needs to leave but something instinctual is telling him to stay. Also, Jinyoung sounds dangerously close to pleading. Yugyeom doesn’t know what he’d do if Jinyoung pleaded with him. He’s already willing enough to do whatever Jinyoung wanted. Yugyeom wants to protect Jinyoung. He wants to make sure that Jinyoung never hurts. 

His heart has made the decision before his mind has. He’s never been one for being proper. 

"I'll stay." Yugyeom says. "Can I do anything in particular?" He asks, and watches with happiness as Jinyoung practically preens at his response. 

"Can I... Can I lie in your lap?" Jinyoung asks quietly. “Like that time?” 

Yugyeom startles. He hadn't expected Jinyoung to say that. Of course he knows exactly which time Jinyoung is talking about. The time that they ran away by the shrine and Yugyeom let Jinyoung rest. 

"If... if you'd like." He says carefully.

Jinyoung carefully rests his head on Yugyeom's thigh. This time feels so different though. This time they're older, and Yugyeom is hyper aware of Jinyoung's everything. Jinyoung isn’t just his tired friend. Jinyoung is an omega willingly resting his head in an alpha’s lap. They’re unmated and Jinyoung is in a Warmth.  

Almost as if Jinyoung can sense his thoughts, he turns his head and the long line of his throat is exposed to Yugyeom. It's practically Yugyeom's for the taking. Yugyeom wonders if Jinyoung even knows what he's doing. He seems more vulnerable in Warmth, and Yugyeom loves and hates that in equal parts. He loves that he gets to see that side of Jinyoung that’s so often hidden. But he hates that it isn’t just for him. Other people see Jinyoung soft and pliant.

“Your scent went sour.” Jinyoung murmurs. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Yugyeom replies quickly. “Everything is okay. Just relax.”

“Hmm.” Jinyoung says, coming out close to a purr. Yugyeom’s thoughts suddenly go in a very different direction. Jinyoung is clearly incredibly comfortable in Yugyeom’s presence and that makes his wolf feel very satisfied. Feel very interested. 

And Jinyoung’s neck is still right in front of him. One bite. And then Jinyoung would be Yugyeom's.

Yugyeom’s hand tenses into a fist. He forces himself to calm down. He reminds himself that Jinyoung asked him to come to make him feel better, not to do something bad. 

“Are you feeling any better?” He asks, ignoring the way his voice cracks. 

“I am. Thank you.” Jinyoung says quietly. He turns his head again to look up right at Yugyeom. Yugyeom looks down at him. “You make me feel better.” Jinyoung whispers. 

Yugyeom doesn’t know how to respond to that. So he doesn’t. He just smoothes a hand over Jinyoung’s hair until Jinyoung’s breath slows and Yugyeom looks down to see that Jinyoung has fallen asleep. 

\--

“Did Jinyoung accept the herbs?” His mother asks when Yugyeom gets home that evening. His body is still heavy with the memory of Jinyoung laying in his lap. 

“Yes.” Yugyeom answers. He feels oddly sheepish and he doesn’t know why. He was just following his mother’s instructions to take the herbs to Jinyoung. 

“I thought he might.” His mother says with a self-assured smile. 

“Are his Warmths worse than others?” Yugyeom finds himself asking. Other omegas function just fine during Warmths, beyond some minor discomforts. He doesn’t know why Jinyoung needs to take special herbs. 

“That’s rather private.” His mother says with a half-frown. “Perhaps you’d best ask him that.” 

“I-” Yugyeom starts to say, and then cuts himself off. Perhaps a conversation about mating isn’t one to have with his mother. Who also happens to be Jinyoung’s healer. “Never mind.” 

His mother eyes him curiously. 

“You like him quite a lot.” She says. 

“He’s one of my best friends.” Yugyeom says in agreement. 

His mother’s expression flickers into something sad for a moment, until she composes herself. Yugyeom wonders why she looked like that. 

“Dinner should be ready once your father gets back.” She says and turns away from him.

\--

Yugyeom lies awake for a long time that night. 

\--

Jinyoung's Warmth ends a few days after it started. Yugyeom doesn’t see Jinyoung for those days. Jinyoung didn’t ask him to return, and Yugyeom didn’t have an excuse to go see him. 

Yugyeom wonders what it meant that Jinyoung was so touchy with him. He knows that omegas seek comfort in Warmth, but that comfort isn’t usually with alphas. Jinyoung must trust him quite a lot, he reckons. There’s a dark feeling in Yugyeom’s wolf when he thinks of Jinyoung seeing Jaebum in Warmth. 

It’s jealousy. Yugyeom is aware of that now. It’s ugly, and he isn’t proud of it, but he’s jealous of Jaebum. Jaebum is an alpha, like him. Jaebum has been Jinyoung’s best friend since childhood. They were expected to be together. 

And Jinyoung… reacted strangely to Yugyeom’s question about Jaebum. 

He trusts that Jinyoung doesn’t have feelings for Jaebum beyond the platonic, but he’s seen the way that Jaebum looks at Jinyoung. Jaebum doesn’t think of Jinyoung the same way. 

Yugyeom can see it in the way that 

And who wouldn’t want Jinyoung to be theirs?

But Jinyoung isn’t anybody’s. He’s his own person. 

Yugyeom doesn’t want Jinyoung to be his, he just wants Jinyoung to be around him just the way that they’ve been. He doesn’t ever want to control Jinyoung or keep him trapped. 

He just wants Jinyoung to keep trusting him, and in return, he’ll keep supporting Jinyoung. 

\--

Yugyeom only has to wait a few more days until he sees Jinyoung. He comes out of his house to see Jinyoung standing right there. 

Jinyoung waves a small wave at him. Yugyeom waves back. Jinyoung walks straight for him. 

“Hello.” Yugyeom says, unable to do anything but stare at Jinyoung. Jinyoung looks simply radiant in the sunlight like this. It’s as if he’s grown more handsome in the few days since Yugyeom last saw him, but Yugyeom knows that isn’t possible. He’s dressed simply in a blue cotton hanbok and he looks so happy to see Yugyeom that it almost hurts.  

“Hello.” Jinyoung greets back. “I was just hoping to catch you.” 

“You’ve caught me.” Yugyeom says. 

There’s a pause. Both of them are just staring at each other.

“How are you?” Yugyeom asks softly. 

“I’m good. I’m really good.” Jinyoung answers. “I’m feeling a lot better.” 

“I’m glad.” Yugyeom says. They both smile at each other. 

“Oh. I forgot to say thank you for coming to visit me when I was in Warmth. It wasn’t just the herbs that made me feel better” Jinyoung says, looking down at his feet. 

“Oh. It’s not a problem.” Yugyeom replies. “I wasn’t sure if you wanted me there but I’m glad that I was wanted.”

“I told you. You distract the pain away.” Jinyoung says, face turning bright red. Yugyeom huffs out a quiet laugh. 

“I don’t know about that. But I’m glad I made you feel better just for a moment.” He says. 

“You do though.” Jinyoung says, sounding embarrassed. For a moment Yugyeom contemplates making fun of him, but decides not to. Jinyoung seems like he’s trying to communicate something, and Yugyeom wants to really listen. 

“I’d do anything if it meant that you wouldn’t be in pain.” Yugyeom says honestly. 

“Thank you Yugyeom.” Jinyoung replies softly. “I… I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You’d be just fine.” 

“I don’t know about that.” Jinyoung says, biting his bottom lip. 

“Oh please.” 

“You’re important to me.” Jinyoung says. “More than you could ever know.” 

“Oh.” Yugyeom says. 

They just look at each other again. But then, Jinyoung smiles at him and Yugyeom feels something glow inside him. This smile is something different than he’s seen on Jinyoung before. This is a smile just for Yugyeom, and Yugyeom doesn’t know how to feel about that. He wants to bottle it up and treasure it forever. 

Yugyeom wants… He wants Jinyoung to smile at him like that forever, so that his eyes crinkle with joy, and he smiles with his teeth. 

Yugyeom wants it so badly that it almost takes his breath away. 

\--

A weightlessness fills Yugyeom for the rest of the day. It’s as if his steps are lighter and his connection to the magic is stronger. 

He doesn’t understand exactly what has happened, but it feels as if something has changed between himself and Jinyoung. He saw Jinyoung during his Warmth -- no, that’s not quite right. Jinyoung wanted Yugyeom to be near during his Warmth. 

He likes Jinyoung. As more than a friend. If Yugyeom is being honest with himself, the feelings have been growing for some time now. Maybe even from the beginning of their friendship. 

But things are different now that they’ve presented. Their status compatibility adds another dimension to their relationship. Yugyeom’s feelings for Jinyoung haven’t sprouted from nothing. They’ve been amplified since his presentation, but he and Jinyoung are fundamentally the same as they’ve always been. 

He suddenly wonders what Jinyoung would say if Yugyeom asked to court him. It’s a traditional rite, but Yugyeom can’t help but think how good it would feel to get Jinyoung to agree, and then to court him. 

He’s already given Jinyoung gifts, but he’s never given him courting gifts. He imagines giving Jinyoung a plush fur to keep him warm through the winter, or food that he’s caught. 

He imagines pressing his lips to Jinyoung’s. Nosing his way across Jinyoung’s neck. He imagines his scent on Jinyoung. He imagines his arms wrapped tightly around Jinyoung, whenever he wants. Which… is almost too much to think about. He could touch Jinyoung, feel that zing of sensation. Yugyeom wonders what would happen if they kissed. He imagines those perfect lips touching his, wrapping his arms around Jinyoung’s waist. 

Yugyeom feels strangely dizzy at his imagined thoughts. 

It wouldn’t be that strange, Yugyeom thinks. They’ve known each other for quite some time. Jinyoung isn’t being courted by anyone else, there’s no reason Yugyeom couldn’t ask. 

Jinyoung turned Jaebum down but Yugyeom lets himself imagine Jinyoung agreeing to court. Jinyoung flinging himself into Yugyeom’s arms. The two of them running as wolves, just pure euphoria. 

Yugyeom can’t think of a better possible outcome. 

He knows that Jinyoung trusts him, but he wants to know if Jinyoung can trust him just that little bit further. He’d be good to Jinyoung. He’d do his best to make sure that Jinyoung is always happy and fed. And if they go through a hard time, he’ll be there for Jinyoung to have someone to lean on. 

\--

The summer is Yugyeom’s favourite time of year. 

The early summer bloom brings herbs that grow only once a year, and while Yugyeom might  not have as much time to collect herbs as he used to, he still makes an effort to go out on his days off work to pick herbs for his mother. 

Being in the mountain fields reminds him of his childhood among the wildflowers in the south and it makes Yugyeom feel a great sense of peace. Jinyoung’s barbs about being a summer wolf might be true. Yugyeom just likes being warm. He loves the feeling of the sun on his skin. He loves being around the flowers and the leaves, so much life. 

 

He’s just crouched on the ground, picking some of the wild ginseng that grows around the shrine when he hears someone approach. He turns and looks up to see Jinyoung standing behind him.

 

“Hi.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“Hi.” Yugyeom replies. “What are you doing here?” 

 

“Looking for you.” Jinyoung says, almost shyly. It’s a strange sight on Jinyoung. He’s always quite confident. 

 

“Oh. What did you need?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“I just wanted to see you.” Jinyoung says. “My thoughts just… wanted to come visit you.” Yugyeom blinks at Jinyoung, surprised at his words. 

 

“Me?” He asks. Jinyoung nods. Something deep in Yugyeom’s bones feels pleased. 

 

“Can you… do you want to go for a walk with me?” Jinyoung asks. Yugyeom looks at his pile of herbs that he’s collecting for his mother and looks back at Jinyoung who looks so hopeful. 

 

“Yes.” He answers simply. “Where do you want to go?”

 

“Can I take you somewhere?” Jinyoung asks. Yugyeom nods. He puts his basket underneath a big tree and makes a note to come back later. Jinyoung watches him wordlessly. 

 

“I’m yours.” Yugyeom says when he’s done, and quickly realizes his mistake. “Uh. No. Not like-”

 

“I know what you meant Yugyeom.” Jinyoung says with a laugh. “Come on.” 

 

He reaches a hand towards Yugyeom, who tentatively takes it. There’s a rush of sensation as their hands touch. 

 

Jinyoung leads them seemingly straight into the forest and Yugyeom lets himself be tugged along.

 

“Where are you taking me?” Yugyeom asks after some time has passed. It’s difficult to tell the time this deep in the forest, but the sun is directly above them now. He wouldn’t be able to say where they are, because all of their surroundings are blending together. 

 

“It’s a secret.” Jinyoung says. “It’s somewhere my dad used to take me.” 

 

Yugyeom doesn’t know how to respond to that answer. 

 

After a while longer, the trees open up to a pool at the base of a small waterfall. The stream is slowing down from the spring melt, but Yugyeom can see how the trickle would turn into a mighty rush with enough water. 

 

The sunlight streams through the sparser leaves, light dappling on Jinyoung’s hair. Yugyeom thinks that he looks even more perfect than usual.  

 

The water is a gorgeous turquoise green, and there are no sounds but the waterfall and some birds chirping in the background. 

 

“It’s so peaceful.” Yugyeom notes. 

 

“I know. My dad used to take me here on warm summer days when I was little. I wasn’t sure that I still remembered the way.” 

 

“So you would’ve gotten me lost?” Yugyeom asks.

 

“No.” Jinyoung answers. “Probably not.” He amends. Yugyeom harrumphs. 

 

Jinyoung steps down onto the rock closer to the pool. Yugyeom follows him. Jinyoung lets go of his hand, and takes a big step down to get to the water level. 

 

Yugyeom jumps down too. Jinyoung stumbles on a rock that’s angled slightly off, and before Yugyeom realizes it, he catches Jinyoung. He didn’t mean to grab Jinyoung by the waist, but he’s holding Jinyoung with one arm, looking down at him. Jinyoung is staring up at him, and all of a sudden Yugyeom feels overwhelmed. He can smell Jinyoung’s pleasant scent more strongly, and it’s as if every part of his body is satisfied with having Jinyoung so near.  

 

Something close to magic thrums in the air between them. 

 

“Are you okay?” Yugyeom asks. Jinyoung nods. “Good.” He says, and pulls Jinyoung up so that he’s upright in front of him. 

 

Gods, he wants to kiss Jinyoung. 

 

He doesn’t. 

 

He watches Jinyoung take his shoes off and wade into the water up to his ankles. 

 

“Come join me.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“Is it warm?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“You baby.” Jinyoung says. “Come on. It’s fine.” 

 

Yugyeom carefully takes his own shoes off and toes carefully into the water. It’s pleasantly cool, warmed somewhere by the sun. 

 

“It isn’t so bad.” Yugyeom says. He looks into the water at the tiny rainbow fish darting around. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom runs into Youngjae and Jihyo on his way back from the shrine, and they immediately notice how happy he is. 

 

“Did something good happen?” Jihyo asks, narrowing her eyes. “Why are you smiling so much?” 

 

“I’m not smiling.” Yugyeom says, but he’s fighting a smile as he responds. She rolls her eyes. 

 

“Oh. It’s Jinyoung related, isn’t it?” Jihyo asks. 

 

“It has to be for him to be all smiley and gross.” Youngjae says. 

 

“It’s not.” Yugyeom protests. “I’m just happy.” 

 

“Clearly.” Jihyo says. “Is there going to be a courting ceremony any time soon?” 

 

“No.” Yugyeom answers, but he’s flushing red. Jihyo and Youngjae exchange a look. “We’re not! I don’t think he likes me like that.” 

 

“Gyeom. I don’t think Jinyoung likes anyone the way he likes you.” Youngjae says slowly. “I’ve known him for ages, and he doesn’t look at anyone the way he looks at you.” 

 

“That’s not true.” Yugyeom says, flushing even deeper. 

 

“It’s true. And you’re no better.” Jihyo says. “The two of you are just… I don’t even know how to explain it.” 

 

“Codependent?” Youngjae offers. 

 

“Not quite.” Jihyo muses. “They do things alone. They’re just…”

 

“Fated?” Youngjae replies, and Yugyeom can see that he’s joking but Jihyo actually nods.

 

“We are not.” Yugyeom says, rolling his eyes. 

 

“Then what are you?” Jihyo asks, eyes twinkling. 

 

Yugyeom finds himself unable to answer that question. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom wonders what might be the best way to ask Jinyoung’s permission to begin courting him. 

 

He deliberates between a formal request and just casually asking Jinyoung. Part of him likes the idea of the traditional ritual, but he also knows Jinyoung and he doesn’t think that Jinyoung would appreciate it. No, he’d want something private and personal. Just between the two of them. 

 

He remembers Jinyoung telling him that he wants to be mated under a full moon and he imagines asking Jinyoung to court him under a full moon. 

 

Jinyoung would be glowing under the moonlight. Yugyeom imagines asking Jinyoung, and Jinyoung grinning at him and agreeing. 

 

It would be magical. 

 

\--

 

These thoughts sustain Yugyeom for the next few days. 

 

\--

 

He’s still floating around in a daze of happiness when everything changes. 

 

He’s just coming home from a walk around the woods and imagining Jinyoung in a mating hanbok when he hears some voices along the path. 

 

It’s one of the quieter paths, so he takes a step closer to see. And the voices sound familiar. Yugyeom peers through the leaves and sees Jinyoung’s friends Sungjin and Jaehyung walking along the path. 

 

They clearly haven’t sensed that he’s there. He ignores them. He can’t make out exactly what they’re talking about.

 

But then he hears his own name.  

 

“Yeah, like he’s going to stop being around Yugyeom. Like any omega could stop being with their fated alpha.” Jaehyung says distinctly. And Yugyeom finds himself paying much closer attention. 

“Yugyeom is the reason that he’s an omega after all.” Sungjin says with a laugh. 

 

“He was so sick. We didn’t even know that he was presenting. Jaebum thought Jinyoung was going to die.”

 

“Die?” Yugyeom repeats to himself, feeling horrified. 

 

“It was the worst presentation I’ve ever seen. Yugyeom’s mother was even baffled by it. She said that she didn’t expect Jinyoung to have such a rough presentation.”

 

“I feel bad for Jinyoung.” Jaehyung says. He doesn’t know what to say. This is the first that he’s heard of Jinyoung’s presentation. 

 

“I don’t know. I feel worse for Jaebum. He’s still in love with Jinyoung and Jinyoung is totally off limits.” 

 

“Yugyeom is no better-” Suddenly the voices peter out. Yugyeom can’t get any closer without revealing that he overheard their conversation. 

 

His hands start shaking. He wouldn’t believe what he just heard if he hadn’t been there. 

 

He had no idea about anything they said. No idea that Jinyoung presented because of him. Their presentations were around the same time, but Yugyeom didn’t know that they were at the same time. That his presentation caused Jinyoung’s. 

 

He can’t think of any reason why either of them would lie. They were speaking to each other, not anyone else. 

 

It has to be true. Yugyeom’s head hurts at the realization. 

 

It’s clear that their presentations were inextricably linked somehow. That’s important, Yugyeom thinks in frustration. It would be something to talk about and try to understand how it affects them. 

 

But of course Jinyoung made the unilateral decision to keep all that to himself. Yugyeom never even had the chance to ask any questions.

 

He doesn’t understand Jinyoung. He isn’t a particularly selfish person, nor is he someone that likes to keep secrets from Yugyeom. Especially such a large secret as this. 

 

Yugyeom’s mind immediately recalls the strange coincidences -- the way he was so attuned to Jinyoung’s scent, the way Jinyoung’s touch brings such a distinct sensation, the way he seems to be so comfortable with Jinyoung. 

 

Because they presented at the same time. They’re fated. But Jinyoung doesn’t want him to know.

 

He knows that he needs to find Jinyoung immediately.

 

Yugyeom casts out in his mind to try and sense where Jinyoung is. Immediately, the magic seems to realize what he wants. 

 

He finds Jinyoung cleaning buckets down beside the river almost instinctively, but he realizes that it must be the magic working with him. 

 

Jinyoung doesn’t look up when Yugyeom approaches.

 

“Can I talk to you?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“Can it wait?” Jinyoung asks, not even looking up from scrubbing the bucket. 

 

“No it can’t wait.” Yugyeom says seriously and Jinyoung’s hands falter. He looks up at Yugyeom. “We presented at the same time.” The wooden bucket falls from Jinyoung’s hands onto the riverbed. 

 

“You know.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“Yes. I know.” Yugyeom replies. “I overheard Sungjin and Jaehyung.” Jinyoung gulps. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Yugyeom asks, more of a whisper than anything. 

 

“I didn’t want to tell you.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“It’s rare to present at the same time.” Yugyeom says. 

 

“Yes. I know.” Jinyoung replies. 

 

“Don’t you think that might be something I’d want to know?” 

 

Jinyoung doesn’t even respond. 

 

“Jinyoung, I just. I just don’t know what to say.” Yugyeom says. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

 

"I wanted to keep it a secret. I thought I'd tell you when the time was right."

 

"What time would that be?" Yugyeom asks. Jinyoung swallows nervously. 

 

"I wasn't sure."

 

"Jinyoung. You know what it means if we presented at the same time-"

 

"I know what it means!" Jinyoung bursts out. Yugyeom falls still. "If I wasn't sure before, when we touched when you were hurt I was sure."

 

"You never said anything." Yugyeom says tensely. “You left.”

 

"I just... I didn't know what to say." 

 

“Anything would’ve been alright.” Yugyeom says. “Really. Anything.”

 

"I waited for so long to present. And then it turned out to be before your twentieth summer? I'm into my twenty-third summer and people have been asking me when I was going to present for years! I was supposed to present early because of Jaebum. Or so I'd been told."

 

"But still, you could've told me." Yugyeom says. "We could've figured something out together."

 

"Yugyeom... You're three years younger than me. What do you know about this stuff?" Jinyoung asks, and Yugyeom's heart hardens. He can't believe that Jinyoung would think that about him just because of their age difference. 

 

"Is that what this is really about? The fact that I'm younger than you?"

 

"No." Jinyoung says but he's lying. 

 

"So you just don't trust me then." Yugyeom says. 

 

“That’s not-”

 

“Then what is it?” Yugyeom asks. “What could make you not tell me something so important?” 

 

“It’s exactly that. It isn’t important. It isn’t important because it won’t affect us.” Jinyoung says, steeling himself and looking right at Yugyeom. And Yugyeom realizes exactly what Jinyoung is trying to get across without outright saying it. 

 

"You're rejecting me. You’re rejecting any bond we have with the magic." 

 

“We don’t have a bond.” Jinyoung says in a flat voice. 

 

“We presented at the same time. You said that you felt it. How could you say that we don’t have a bond?” 

 

"Because we don’t have any bond." Jinyoung says again. Yugyeom feels himself grow angry. How can Jinyoung hurt both of them like this?

 

"No." He replies sharply. "You're not doing this." 

 

"I am."

 

"Is there someone you like?" Yugyeom asks. That’s the only way he can think that Jinyoung would do this. There’s no other reason to lie to him, to hide this from Yugyeom. 

 

“That isn’t relevant.” Jinyoung answers. Yugyeom wants to scoff. 

 

“How is it not relevant?” He asks, confused by how Jinyoung is handling this entire conversation. 

 

“It’s not relevant because I’m rejecting you and there’s no claim that you have to me!” Jinyoung yells, his face turning red. Yugyeom forces himself to take some deep breaths. 

 

“But you still told everyone not to tell me that we presented at the same time. You could’ve just had a quiet, mature conversation about this.” 

 

"It was for your own good!" 

 

"How was it good for me to not know that we're fated somehow?" Yugyeom asks and watches as Jinyoung shirks away. "You made everyone keep that secret." Yugyeom says. "You really hate the idea of being fated to me enough to get my closest friends to keep a secret that large." 

 

The magic crackles around them. It feels almost angry to Yugyeom, and he wonders if something is happening. His body feels tense and on-edge, like it’s waiting for a threat that hasn’t materialized yet. 

 

“Is this about Jaebum?” Yugyeom asks before he can stop himself. Jinyoung slaps Yugyeom across the cheek and Yugyeom steps back instantly. 

 

“I’m sorry Jinyoung. I’m so sorry.” He says in horror. Not once has Jinyoung ever even threatened to raise a hand towards him. 

 

“How dare you?” Jinyoung asks, his voice going even icier. Yugyeom feels a strange sense of fear. He’s afraid of Jinyoung, he realizes. Afraid of what Jinyoung might do to him if pushed any further. “How dare you ask if this is about Jaebum? You of all people should understand how I feel about expectations!” He’s shouting at the end of this, but it’s cold. So cold. 

 

“I think I should go.” Yugyeom says shakily. 

 

“I think you should too.” Jinyoung agrees. “And I think… I think maybe we shouldn’t see each other for a while.” 

 

“Jinyoung-” He starts to say. 

 

“Leave me alone Yugyeom. Just. Leave me alone.” Jinyoung says, shaking his head. It’s Jinyoung’s disappointment and anger that causes Yugyeom’s feet to root to the ground. 

 

Walking away from Jinyoung is the worst thing that Yugyeom has ever done. Every part of his body feels weird. He wonders if it’s just the anger that’s making him feel strange and unsettled. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom can’t sleep that night. His conversation with Jinyoung repeats over and over in his head. His body still feels weird, almost as if its hyper aware of something that Yugyeom can’t identify. 

 

There’s a soft huff and a small weight on him. Yugyeom looks down to see the forest spirit trampling over his stomach with it’s small legs, as if trying to get him to sleep. 

 

“I can’t sleep.” He says to it. It huffs again, and walks over his belly button. “What do you want?” 

 

Of course, it doesn’t respond. 

 

“What do I do about Jinyoung?” He asks it, and it nuzzles against his stomach. “I can’t do that to him.” He says. “No matter how much I want to.” 

 

Yugyeom reaches down and pats the forest spirit gently until it falls asleep. 

 

It’s a long time until he falls asleep himself. 

 

\--

 

The next day, Yugyeom sees Jinyoung on the way into the forest. It’s just brief, and they aren’t close enough to speak to each other, but Yugyeom can smell the way that Jinyoung’s scent sours, and then Jinyoung jerks away as if he’s been scalded. 

 

He all but flees from Yugyeom. Something ugly sits in the pit of Yugyeom’s stomach. They’ve never been like this. Not even when they were strangers. Yugyeom has never caused Jinyoung to look like that, to act like that. 

 

\--

 

“Is everything alright?” Youngjae asks. He looks concerned, as if Yugyeom is sick. Yugyeom contemplates lying, making something up. But it’s Youngjae, and he wouldn’t have even known what happened to Jinyoung without Youngjae. 

 

“No.” Yugyeom says honestly. “I… I think that I ruined everything with Jinyoung.” Youngjae’s mouth falls open. 

 

“What happened?” 

 

“I… He… He doesn’t want to have anything to do with our fate.” Yugyeom says, blinking. Everything that happened spills out of Yugyeom’s mouth.  

 

“Wait.” Youngjae says. “Run all that by me again.” He looks puzzled, but mostly sad.  

 

“I’m sorry. None of that probably made any sense.” Yugyeom apologizes. “I don’t think that I’m thinking straight right now. I don’t feel very good.” 

 

“You don’t look very good.” Youngjae says. “Maybe you should ask your mother to have a look.” 

 

“I’m fine.” Yugyeom says. “I’ll be fine. Jinyoung and I will be fine.” 

 

Youngjae clearly knows that this is a lie, but he doesn’t say anything further and Yugyeom has never been more grateful for his friend. 

 

\--

 

He manages to wait a few days to let Jinyoung cool off before approaching him again. He hated seeing Jinyoung look so disgusted to see him. 

 

It takes him a few hours to even track down Jinyoung, who he eventually corners by the scroll cabin. 

 

Jinyoung tries to get away but Yugyeom somehow boxes him in, forcing Jinyoung to stay. 

 

“Jinyoung, can I please talk to you?” Yugyeom asks pleadingly. 

 

“I’m busy.” Jinyoung replies brusquely. 

 

“I just want to see how you are!” Yugyeom says. 

 

“I don’t want to talk to you.” Jinyoung replies. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Yugyeom says. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” 

 

“I don’t care.” 

 

“What can I do to make this better?” 

 

“Nothing!” Jinyoung says, spitting the words out. His eyes are practically blazing at Yugyeom. Yugyeom gulps. 

 

“There has to be something. Let’s just go for a walk and-” 

 

“No! I’m not doing anything with you. Not when you’re so stupid!” 

 

“I’m sorry.” Yugyeom repeats. 

 

Jinyoung just pushes past Yugyeom, shoulder slamming into Yugyeom’s. Yugyeom’s heart clenches. 

 

\--

 

“How’s Jinyoung?” Jihyo asks gingerly later that day.  

 

“Ignoring me still.” Yugyeom answers. “He’s really unhappy.”

 

“Really?” She asks. “I didn’t think that he would.” 

 

“He definitely is.” Yugyeom says. “And I don’t know how I can fix it.” 

 

“He’ll come around.” Youngjae says. “He has to.” 

 

\--

 

Jinyoung doesn’t come around. He continues to resolutely ignore Yugyeom. He doesn’t meet Yugyeom’s eye when they’re forced to be around each other. He makes sure that he isn’t in the same area as Yugyeom whenever possible. 

 

Yugyeom lets him. He gets it. He fucked up badly. But it hurts.  

 

\--

 

It actually physically hurts. The symptoms begin as simple headaches, just a low hum of pain sitting in the back of his skull. 

 

But then the pain turns into a stomachache. His mother says that it’s just stress, that it’ll go away when the stress does but Yugyeom doesn’t know when that will be. 

 

He doesn’t know when Jinyoung is going to talk to him again. 

 

\--

 

A week drags along. Jihyo and Youngjae pester Yugyeom daily to talk to Jinyoung again. 

 

Yugyeom waits. He doesn’t see Jinyoung all week and he doesn’t seek him out. He wonders if that was his mistake with their previous encounter. He was acting too aggressive. He was acting like an alpha. 

So he plans more carefully this time. Instead of cornering Jinyoung, he just lies in wait on a path that he knows Jinyoung has to cross in his day, going to the cabin that border patrol is based out of. 

 

He doesn’t need to wait long. Jinyoung walks hastily down the path, and Yugyeom steps in front of him. This time Jinyoung clearly has an escape. It’s more public. Yugyeom hopes that this is enough. 

 

“Yugyeom.” Jinyoung says with a sigh. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Yugyeom says. “Please let me make this better between us.” 

 

“Why? Because we’re fated or something?” Jinyoung asks. “Leave me alone.” 

 

“No. Because you’re my friend.” 

 

“You didn’t care about that when you asked if I was rejecting you because of Jaebum.” Jinyoung snaps. 

 

“I’m sorry! I spoke without thinking!” 

 

“You think of me like some dumb omega.” Jinyoung says, shaking his head. “You think I’m illogical. Naive. Easily swayed.” 

 

“I don’t think that at all!” Yugyeom says, feeling despair swell in his chest. Jinyoung isn’t understanding him at all. But maybe he isn’t understanding Jinyoung. And that’s a serious problem. 

 

“Please stop trying to talk to me.” Jinyoung says, looking so desperate that Yugyeom has to agree. He’s already hurt Jinyoung enough. He can’t hurt him more. 

 

“Okay.” He agrees. “I’ll leave you alone.” He adds, finally admitting defeat. 

 

\--

 

Afterwards Yugyeom realizes that his headache and stomachache had briefly subsided, but later once he’s alone, the pain comes back stronger. Pain crackles in his head, and radiates down his spine. 

 

He curls into his bedroll, trying to alleviate any of the pain but it doesn’t matter. 

 

Yugyeom doesn’t sleep the night after their fight. 

 

\--

 

Since Jinyoung won’t talk to Yugyeom, Yugyeom gets his friends to see how Jinyoung is doing. 

 

It hurts to not know how Jinyoung is, but it hurts even more to just pretend that he doesn’t care about Jinyoung. 

 

So Jihyo and Youngjae do reconnaissance, and report back to Yugyeom every few days to keep him updated. Just knowing that Jinyoung is being looked after by his friends makes him feel a tiny bit better. A tiny bit. 

 

At first nothing changes, except Jihyo tells Yugyeom that Jinyoung seems quieter than usual. 

 

And then, one day a few weeks after their falling-out, Youngjae brings news. 

 

“Jinyoung is on day patrol now on the border.” Youngjae says carefully, as if afraid to see what Yugyeom’s reaction will be. 

 

It’s clear why Jinyoung chose to go on day patrol -- so that he doesn’t need to see Yugyeom during the day. He’s taking his avoidance to a new level. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom decides to make Jinyoung’s avoidance a little easier by taking up some work at night on the magic search.

 

“You’re with Nayeon.” The beta says when Yugyeom reports for the first time. “She knows all there is to know about searching for magic creatures.” 

 

Nayeon is an alpha too, a few years older than him.

 

She’s be cute if it weren’t for her razor sharp canines and the way she looks like she’d kill him. 

 

“Come on then.” Nayeon says with a smirk. “I’ll show you how to do everything.”

 

“Okay.” Yugyeom agrees, almost tripping over his feet to follow her. 

 

She teaches him how to reach out to the magic and put out feelers to sense for other spirits. 

 

“Can’t you just listen for evil creatures?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“We don’t just keep an eye on evil spirits.” Nayeon explains. “We want to look out for good spirits too. It keeps an eye on the state of the magic in the area.” 

 

“What about forest spirits?” Yugyeom asks, thinking of the fluffy ball probably curled up on his bed at this exact moment. 

 

“They’re common enough. We don’t see them much though, they don’t like Wolves or humans.” 

 

“Oh.” Yugyeom says. He still doesn’t know why the forest spirit seems to like him so much. 

“Do you come across evil spirits often?” Yugyeom asks. Nayeon snorts. 

 

“No. Hardly at all. And not usually during the day. It’s pretty safe.” 

 

“Oh good.” Yugyeom says, shuddering at the memory of the flesh spirit.  

 

“Why? You scared?” She asks. 

 

“And what if I am?” Yugyeom asks in response and Nayeon smiles. 

 

“Then join the club. Only morons aren’t afraid of evil spirits.” She says. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom starts to dream about Jinyoung. They aren’t friendly dreams either. 

 

The first dream he has alarms him. Because it begins with Jinyoung begging for him, begging for Yugyeom to please touch him. And Jinyoung never begs for anything. 

 

“Please!” Jinyoung whines. He’s half-naked, just his underclothes half-torn off. Yugyeom looks down to see a smear of something slick underneath Jinyoung. Jinyoung smells so good, so stupidly appealing that Yugyeom feels dizzy with it. 

 

He traces a finger over Jinyoung’s chest, feeling the way Jinyoung reacts just to the simple touch. Yugyeom avoids Jinyoung’s nipples, tracing around but never touching directly. Jinyoung arches up into the touch but Yugyeom doesn’t give in. 

 

“Yugyeom.” Jinyoung gasps. “Please. I need it. Touch me!” 

 

“Where do you want me to touch you?” Yugyeom asks, pulling his hands off and watching Jinyoung squirm at the loss of sensation. 

 

“Everywhere.” Jinyoung answers, keening upward. He looks upset, and Yugyeom know that he’s kept him waiting for too long. 

 

“Shh. It’s okay. I’ve got you.” He says, coming down to settle on top of Jinyoung’s smaller frame. His shoulders bracket Jinyoung’s and his legs fall on either side of Jinyoung’s waist. 

 

He gives Jinyoung a bruising kiss, feeling Jinyoung sigh into the kiss with relief. 

 

Slowly he begins to grind down on Jinyoung, feeling the way Jinyoung lifts his hips to meet Yugyeom halfway. 

 

Yugyeom is fully hard and he wants nothing more than to be knotted deep inside Jinyoung. 

 

“I need you.” He mutters into Jinyoung’s ear. 

 

“I need you more.” Jinyoung groans, hips stuttering. “Al-alpha.” 

 

“Say that again.” He growls. Jinyoung moans. 

 

“My alpha.” He repeats breathily, looking up at Yugyeom with wide eyes full of love. 

 

He wakes up with a start. His heart is pounding and it takes him a moment to realize that he’s achingly hard. He wants to throw up. 

 

\--

 

The dreams continue. They differ from night to night. Sometimes Jinyoung has his mouth on Yugyeom. Sometimes they’re just grinding on each other. Sometimes Yugyeom actually knots Jinyoung. 

 

But no matter what, dream-Jinyoung calls dream-Yugyeom his alpha, and Yugyeom wakes up on the edge of release. 

 

\--

 

His days are spent dreaming of Jinyoung and his nights are spent working, and trying to avoid thinking about Jinyoung. 

Yugyeom is paired up with Nayeon most of the time, and they strike up a friendship. 

 

Nayeon turns out to be very funny, and very easy to talk to. And even though he knows that she’s friends with Jaebum, she doesn’t ever say anything about Jinyoung. Yugyeom couldn’t be more grateful. 

 

The task seems to mostly consist of wandering around the forest. Yugyeom can think of worse ways to spend his days. 

 

They don’t come across any evil spirits, but they seem to come across plenty of good spirits. 

 

“This is weird.” Nayeon says after a water spirit all but cuddles up to Yugyeom beside the river. “It’s like they’re attracted to you or something.” 

 

“They can’t be.” Yugyeom says as the spirit slithers around his legs and makes what Yugyeom takes to be a happy noise. 

 

“Then why do we come across multiple good spirits every time we go out searching for magic, and no evil spirits? And I don’t see those kind of numbers when I go by myself or with the other Wolves.” She says, narrowing his eyes at him. 

 

“I promise I’m not doing anything to make them come to me.” He promises. 

 

“It wouldn’t be a bad thing. It would just be… something new.” Nayeon says. “I’m hungry, let’s go find something to eat and then crash.”

 

\--

 

The only time that Yugyeom sees Jinyoung in almost a full moon cycle is when he’s out on a run, and it’s just briefly. 

 

Jinyoung makes eye contact with his Wolf for a split second and Yugyeom can feel the longing rear up inside him. He wants to speak to Jinyoung, but before he knows it, Jinyoung has raced off into the woods. 

 

Yugyeom hates it. He hates the whole situation so much 

 

\--

 

“Are you pursuing anyone?” His father asks at dinner one night. His parents have noticed his change in mood but they haven’t asked him any questions about it. 

 

“No.” Yugyeom says, taking a large bite of meat. 

 

“Is there anyone you want to pursue?” His mother asks gently. 

 

“No.” Yugyeom repeats. It’s a lie of course. Even though he can’t, he’d pursue Jinyoung in a heartbeat. 

 

“You’ve presented now.” His mother says. “You’re allowed to court someone.” Yugyeom is abruptly reminded of his plans to court Jinyoung. 

 

“I know.” He says. “If it happens I’ll let you know.” 

 

He sees the worried look that passes between his parents. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom begins to spend as much time as he can in his Wolf form, running with Nayeon at night, or wandering around in the early morning before he knows that Jinyoung is on patrol. 

 

It takes him a while to realize that his connection to the magic is dulled. It takes significantly more work to reach out and grab the connection to shift. The thread seems to dance away from his fingertips, drifting just out of reach. 

 

At least being in his wolf form brings some relief. Wolves still feel emotions of course, but they don’t ruminate on them the same way that humans do. 

 

Yugyeom has never been more grateful to be a Wolf. He takes every opportunity to get away from the tightness in his chest and the sadness in his heart. 

 

He pauses each time before he shifts back, wishing that he could stay in his wolf form. But Yugyeom has never been one to run from his problems. No good would come from hiding away. Someday he’ll have to see Jinyoung and sort out whatever mess he’s made. 

 

\--

 

It’s growing close to the end of summer when Yugyeom sees Jinyoung again. Or really, Jinyoung sees Yugyeom and Nayeon together. 

 

Yugyeom meets Jinyoung’s gaze, and looks beside him to see Nayeon eagerly chatting to him, leaning in. He knows what it must look like, but Nayeon just works with him. 

 

He forces his eyes off of Jinyoung and continues working. Recently they’ve been inundated with forest spirits, and some of them seem to be taking a liking to Nayeon. 

 

After his shift though, he finds Jinyoung waiting for him outside his house, illuminated by the rising sun.

 

Jinyoung stalks towards Yugyeom, looking like he’s ready to slice Yugyeom’s throat open. In a twisted way, Yugyeom likes knowing that all of Jinyoung's attention is on him. 

 

"You've been busy lately." Jinyoung says coldly. 

 

"Yeah. What about it?" Yugyeom snaps. "I thought you wanted me to keep away from you." 

 

"I..." Jinyoung tapers off. "Forget it." He snaps back. 

 

“Forgotten.” Yugyeom says. “Now leave me alone.” 

 

“I will. And that girl of yours.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“Nayeon?” Yugyeom asks and Jinyoung scoffs at the name. “You’re not allowed to get upset because I work with someone. Actually, you’re not allowed to get upset about anyone I spend time with since it isn’t you anymore.” 

 

“She’s an alpha.” 

 

“She’s someone I work with.” Yugyeom says. “I don’t like her.” 

 

“I don’t believe you.” Jinyoung says. 

 

“Fine. Believe me. Or don’t. But you don’t get to meddle in my life.” Yugyeom says. 

 

“I’m not meddling! I’m just warning you away from someone who wants something from you.” 

 

“And what if she wants something from me?” Yugyeom asks just to provoke Jinyoung. “Why can’t I give it to her?” 

 

“Oh. So you’ll knot her. Who cares?” Jinyoung asks, each word like a knife to Yugyeom’s heart. The words sound so crude coming from Jinyoung’s mouth. 

 

“Exactly. Who cares? There’s nothing between us.” Yugyeom says coldly, twisting Jinyoung’s words back to him. Yugyeom’s chest twinges as he says it. Jinyoung looks as if Yugyeom has physically hit him. Yugyeom feels as if he’s physically hit Jinyoung. 

 

Jinyoung just storms off. 

 

The ache in Yugyeom’s chest takes hours to dissipate after their fight. 

 

\--

 

Time passes even more slowly than Yugyeom thought possible. His body hurts in some way at all times. A unique kind of weariness comes over him. 

 

\--

 

At a village dinner sometime later that month, the head of the village stands up to make an announcement. Yugyeom is sitting with his parents when Jinyoung’s father rings the gong to indicate that he needs to speak. The crowd settles down. 

 

“Moon Village will be sending our annual tributes to the king next week.” He says. “As you all know, the king has requested an increase in tributes and this means that we will be asking you of two to accompany the administrator to Hanyang to make sure that everything is delivered properly.” 

 

Murmuring breaks out among the crowd. Jinyoung’s father continues. 

 

“It will be a long trip, but it would be a great effort to our village. I am unable to go myself, which is why I’m asking all of you. Please come talk to me if you’re interested in accompanying the tributes.” 

 

\--

 

“A trip to the capital hmm?” Yugyeom’s mother muses as they walk back to their house after dinner.

 

“We can’t go.” His father says. “But Yugyeom… You could go.” 

 

“Me?” Yugyeom asks. “I don’t know.” 

 

Except, a trip to Hanyang would be a trip away from Jinyoung, Yugyeom realizes. Perhaps that would be good for them -- for both of them. Jinyoung wouldn’t have to feel as if he needs to be out all day, and Yugyeom wouldn’t need to spend his nights working. They could have a break and be able to live more freely. 

 

And maybe, just maybe, by the time Yugyeom returned from Hanyang, Jinyoung would be willing to talk. 

 

“Would I be allowed?” He asks. His mother quirks a smile. 

 

“You’re old enough to make your own decisions.” She says. 

 

“But thank you for asking all the same.” His father says. 

 

“I’ll think about it.” Yugyeom says. 

 

\--

 

He hasn’t seen anything of the world since his family left the flower fields. He’s only heard of the great city of Hanyang with all the people and the bustling palace. 

 

It would be an adventure and a break from Jinyoung. Yugyeom can’t see any drawbacks to just asking to accompany the tributes. 

 

His mind is made up then -- he’s going to ask Jinyoung’s father to let him go to Hanyang. 

 

\--

 

The next afternoon after he’s woken from sleep, he goes to find Jinyoung’s father in the head alpha cabin. It doesn’t seem as intimidating the second time, Yugyeom thinks. He feels more confident. 

 

But he falters for a moment. He hadn’t thought about what Jinyoung told his father. Had he told his father about their fight? About their … something? Yugyeom doesn’t want to label it but he knows that there’s something between him and Jinyoung. If the rest of the village could see it, Yugyeom has no doubts that Jinyoung’s own father is well aware of their falling out. 

 

Yugyeom reminds himself that this is an opportunity for their falling out to clear up. For them to have time for themselves. 

 

He steps into the alpha’s cabin and takes off his shoes. He nods to the administrator, who gestures the way to Jinyoung’s father’s office. 

 

“I’m sorry to interrupt.” Yugyeom says and bows a greeting. 

 

“Oh. Yugyeom.” Jinyoung’s father says with a smile. “Come in.” He watches Jinyoung’s father pour them both a cup of tea -- the same kind that Jinyoung had made for him. Yugyeom’s chest hurts recalling that memory. 

 

“Thank you.” Yugyeom says, and they drink their tea in silence. From inside the alpha’s cabin the sounds of the village are muffled. 

 

“What can I do for you today? Jinyoung seems to be settling into his work on border duty, so something else must bring you here today.” Jinyoung’s father asks once they’ve had their first cup of tea and poured another. 

 

“I’d like to volunteer to go to Hanyang.” Yugyeom says nervously, heart thumping just at the mention of Jinyoung’s name. 

 

“You would?” Jinyoung’s father asks, looking curious. “Ah. I’ll put your name in then.”

 

“Thank you.” Yugyeom says. 

 

“Thank you.” Jinyoung’s father says. “You’re doing all of Moon Village a good deed.” 

 

“I’m just volunteering.” Yugyeom says, smiling slightly. 

 

“We’ll announce the selection in two days.” Jinyoung’s father says. “Say hello to your parents for me in the meantime.” 

 

“I will.” Yugyeom promises with a smile. “I’ll go then and leave you to your work.” Jinyoung’s father nods and smiles in acknowledgment. 

 

As Yugyeom slides the door shut behind him to leave, Jinyoung’s father looks deep in thought. If he knows about Jinyoung and Yugyeom, he’s a great actor, Yugyeom thinks. 

 

He realizes on his way home though, that the more likely reality is that Jinyoung hasn’t told his father anything. That their falling-out wasn’t important enough to affect Jinyoung, or to make him feel as if he needed to tell his parents. 

 

Yugyeom can’t decide which of those options are worse. 

 

\--

 

He tells his parents that he asked to go to Hanyang. 

 

“I hope you get selected.” His father says warmly. Yugyeom is grateful for their support. 

 

“Will everything be alright for him to go to Hanyang?” His mother asks carefully, and Yugyeom looks between his parents. “We… it’s been more than twenty years since we left.” 

 

“Yugyeom isn’t us.” His father says. Yugyeom blinks. “He’s allowed to visit.” 

 

“What are you talking about?” Yugyeom asks. “I’m confused.” 

 

“There was some trouble before you were born.” His mother says nonchalantly. “We had to leave the capital.” 

 

“You’ve never told me about that.” 

 

“It was before we had you.” His father says. “We… It wasn’t a good time.” 

 

“Should I go back and say that I don’t want to go?” Yugyeom asks nervously. He’s never heard anything about his parents spending time in Hanyang. 

 

“It won’t affect you Yugyeom.” His mother replies. “You should go. You should see the world. You shouldn’t be weighed down by your parents.” 

 

“But-”

 

“No buts.” His father interrupts. “We want you to go. We’re happy you put your name forward.” 

 

“But why did you have to leave?”

 

“Because we were asked to.” His mother says, sounding oddly pained. His father reaches over to stroke her hand. Yugyeom has more questions, but his parents don’t seem as if they want to continue the conversation any further. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom wakes up on the day of the decision with a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. It isn’t quite anticipation, nor is it fear. He dresses and eats quickly, saying goodbye to his parents quickly. 

 

Youngjae and Jihyo find him on the path to the centre of the village. They look nervous. 

 

“Yugyeom, have you seen?” Jihyo asks with wide eyes. 

 

“Seen what?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“You’re going to want to go have a look at the people who’ve been chosen to go to Hanyang.” Youngjae says. Jihyo looks like she wants to say something, but she just shakes her head. 

 

“Go now.” She says. 

 

So Yugyeom goes. There’s hardly anyone around, the news must not be particularly exciting. 

 

Yugyeom steps closer. 

 

There, on the board in the centre of the village is Yugyeom’s name. But so is Jinyoung’s name. 

 

Yugyeom’s mouth falls open. This is impossible. There’s no way that he’s read the board properly. He closes his eyes and re-opens them. The characters that spell out their names haven’t magically shifted. He and Jinyoung have been selected to accompany the administrator to Hanyang despite all odds. 

 

As if he’d known that Yugyeom was there, Jinyoung materializes beside him looking as if he’s ready to murder Yugyeom. 

 

“Come with me.” Jinyoung growls at him, and grabs onto Yugyeom’s arm to pull them away from the display board. Immediately, there’s a shock of sensation at the contact. Yugyeom’s body practically hums. It feels as if it’s been an eternity since they last touched. 

 

Jinyoung’s grip is so tight on Yugyeom’s arm that it hurts. But Jinyoung is touching him, and that sparkly feeling is there, and Yugyeom isn’t about to tell Jinyoung to let him go. 

 

Jinyoung leads them to a large willow tree just at the base of the mountain path, and swats the branches away to get them into the clearing at the trunk of the tree. 

 

Then Jinyoung all but throws Yugyeom’s arm away. It’s as if the contact hurt him, and that makes Yugyeom’s tender heart strain. 

 

They’re completely tucked out of sight under a willow tree. No one can see them. Jinyoung must be trying to avoid having them seen together, Yugyeom realizes. 

 

"How did you manage to get on the trip to Hanyang?" Jinyoung asks coldly. He crosses his arms over his chest, undoubtedly to look more intimidating, Yugyeom thinks. 

 

“I asked.” Yugyeom answers, trying to be just as cold.

 

“Why?” Jinyoung snarls. 

 

"I was trying to get away from you. What's your excuse?" 

 

“Unbelievably, the same.” Jinyoung says with a scowl. “I’m going to ask him to change one of us out of this trip. We’re not going to Hanyang together.” 

 

“Good.” Yugyeom says tensely. 

 

“Of course it’s good. Like I’d want to go on that journey with you.” Jinyoung says cruelly. Yugyeom wants to grab Jinyoung by the shoulders and shake him. 

 

“Right.” Yugyeom says. “Me neither.” He adds, trying to sound cruel. He doesn’t think it quite works. 

 

“Meet me here tomorrow morning and I’ll tell you what happens.” Jinyoung says. Yugyeom nods. “Wait a few moments after I leave. I don’t want people to see us together.” 

 

“Will do.” Yugyeom replies, feeling the sting of Jinyoung’s words in his heart. Jinyoung sweeps out under the long branches and leaves. 

 

Yugyeom’s chest hurts. 

 

\--

 

Yugyeom waits under the willow tree for Jinyoung the next morning, stomach in knots with both anticipation and anxiety. He wants to see Jinyoung, but he’s nervous about what Jinyoung is going to say. 

 

And Jinyoung is late. The sun is well into the sky by the time Jinyoung appears. And Yugyeom can see Jinyoung’s displeasure. His stomach knots a little tighter. 

 

Yugyeom crosses his arms together as Jinyoung approaches the willow tree. He already knows what Jinyoung is going to say just based on Jinyoung’s stormy expression, and he needs all the comfort he can get. 

 

“My father won’t change his mind.” Jinyoung says gruffly, confirming Yugyeom’s assumption. “Both of us are still going to Hanyang.” 

 

“What do you mean he won’t change his mind? What did you say?” Yugyeom asks. 

 

“I mean exactly what I just said.” Jinyoung says harshly, eyes flashing at Yugyeom. 

 

“What did you tell him about us?” Yugyeom presses. “Why didn’t you say anything to convince him?” 

 

“I didn’t tell him anything about us!” Jinyoung says, raising his voice. “There was no need.” 

 

“Of course you didn’t.” Yugyeom says with a sigh. “Because of course there’s nothing to say.” 

 

“Yugyeom-” 

 

“I suppose I’ll see you the day after tomorrow when we leave.” Yugyeom says brusquely. It’s his turn to leave first. He feels disappointed and hurt that Jinyoung refused to tell his father about anything that’s happened between Yugyeom and Jinyoung. 

 

He’s angry that he’s going to go on this journey with Jinyoung, that he has to see acidic eyes and harsh words. He’s angry that Jinyoung is so angry. 

 

But yet in a tiny, strange way he’s oddly excited to have an excuse to see Jinyoung every day for the duration of the trip. Jinyoung isn’t even speaking to him, and he’s made it clear that he isn’t happy around Yugyeom but even so. There’s a connection there, no matter how much Jinyoung wants to deny it. 

 

It's official -- Yugyeom is going to Hanyang with someone fated to him in a way that neither of them fully understand. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now the story is really beginning 😈😈 . 
> 
> Hanbok is the traditional clothes in Joseon.


End file.
